Category: Life Events

What Did I Want to Be Growing Up?

To some people, maybe their dreams stick with them throughout their childhood and into adulthood. Others, their dreams change constantly. Like me for example, what I wanted to do with my life was more about what was really going on in the world. Like what influence had a deeper effect on me. Let me break it down for you…

Michael Jordan

Oh yeah, the 90s was prime Jordan all the way. Watching the Bulls with my brothers was a whole experience in itself. From what I remember, if we weren’t watching the game we were playing it in the driveway. Oftentimes together but even when I was by myself or wanted to play, I would go out and make up scenarios in my mind to drive the experience playing basketball alone much more meaningful. I kept at it for a while… at least until the next big thing happened.

Tiger Woods and my uncle

Talk about revolutionizing the game of golf. Tiger was like a professional version of Happy Gilmore. The new wave of crowd and fans he brought in was surreal. It was shortly after his career blew up was about the same time my uncle introduced us all to the sport. I feel that with this particular game, everyone starts out terrible. I was no different. I used to get really upset the first few years of my golfing career. Eventually that changed (thank goodness), and I finally became a decent golfer. Which is why they say the game is mostly mental than physical, but it helps to have a good physique for the game.

This game however stuck around for me. I really did want to go pro, but I forgot to eat my vegetables during the crucial moments of my life and just stayed short and unworthy. But to this day golf still is one of my biggest passions in life.

The Hidden Reality?

Even while my childhood dreams continue to change, one thing that took a long while for me to notice was what didn’t change… cars. Fast cars. This realization that happened only just a few years ago made me wonder, “am I a professional racecar driver in disguised?”

Always was into cars growing up. For Christmas, I would get anything car stuff for the longest time. You know one of those electric racetracks that only require you to put your finger on the trigger. But if you press down all the way all the time, the car launches off the track. Like when Tim added more power to his car in Home Improvement. [insert grunting here]

Anyway, a little while after two crucial points hit: The Fast and the Furious released and my brother buying his first car and modifying it while I just watched him whenever I can on the weekends. I wouldn’t even say anything most of the time, if I heard him doing car work in the garage, I would stop anything I was doing and go out to see what he was working on next. This eventually would inspire me to do the same to my future first car. And I tell ya, if I could I would have never sold it because I was too lazy to look for a job to make money and instead went this route. Life choices.

With the Fast and Furious franchise (although they lost their way in the later films in my opinion), never knew how much my life would change. When that first movie released on DVD and my brother bought it, I watched it pretty much every day after school for who knows how long. It was my whole life for a while. And before I go deeper down this rabbit hole, I’ll save that story for another time.

For now, let’s say when I find myself driving down curved roads, I like to use the same line that professionals would use. I have this tendency to keep my speed up especially going on motorways but oftentimes I’m stuck behind drivers that will take almost any curved roads really slow… which I get. You’re being safe but the one downfall about that is you don’t accelerate fast enough getting on motorways where anyone already on it has to make these decisions they shouldn’t have to. “Oh man, do I slow down, speed up or merge over?” And if they can’t merge over from traffic, then they have to make a choice.

Me? I like to remove that choice for them. My style of driving is keeping everyone flowing smoothly (when they can). Now to be clear, I’m not weaving in and out of traffic or speeding like crazy. I go at what I’m comfortable with and stay out of the passing lane when possible. In theory, you would think this is pretty simple for anyone driving to manage but sadly it’s not… uhh, anyway I digress.

So, where was I?

I think it’s great that there are those out there who know what they want to do with their lives and stick it through. Here’s to hoping you enjoy it and that you’re living your life to the fullest. While I’m still figuring out mine, it’s just something that I can’t quite commit to. Only because I’m uncertain of what it is I want to do. Even today. To stick with one path and hoping it does work out. Maybe I’m just wired where I like to experience life one moment at a time and going with the flow. Someday maybe I will find what it is I’m looking for, but until then…

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What It’s Like to Do SOLO Adventures

As an introvert, this here would sound like it’s right up my alley. But when it comes to doing so many things alone, there is still this sense of anxiety that I get from going outside my comfort zone. And by that I’m referring to going outside my home. Now, unless I’m meeting up with people I don’t mind going out in public by myself, but when it’s intentional, well, that’s when I feel vulnerable. Although, I still feel some type of way about being out alone, I have started doing things to slowly break out of my comfort zone.

Fish On!

One of the first things in I’ve done without hesitation really since my 30s was going out and fishing. Besides planned trips with friends or meeting up with them, I have from time to time just gone out on my own. Even if it’s not much considering you’re more than likely out and almost no one is around, you’re still out there. I believe it had something to do with the excitement of hooking a fish on your line. Almost as if you get a quick burst of adrenaline and/or dopamine in your system.

Wine & Canvas

At one of my last apartments I lived at on my own, every so often there would be almost like a community board but it’s plastered in random spots throughout. But one thing that caught my eye was how an instructor was visiting and they had sign-ups for this wine and canvas class. What’s not to like about drinking and trying to paint and not caring if you’re any good?! For me though, I always had a soft spot for art. And whether that be painting, sketching, etc. I signed up anyway, once again without hesitation.

Being how (at the time) I had this tendency to run late almost everywhere I go, this time was no different. But I still made it before they started. When I arrived at the community room… all women (not that it mattered to me but why leave it out of the story). At one point I wasn’t sure if I was in the right spot. Once I had the courage to ask, they welcomed me in. Somewhere in the middle of our class, I heard one of the girls whispering to her friend, “His is really good.” Inside I was blushing but what they didn’t know was that I took a lot of art classes in high school.

The Big Screen

I think depending on the type of person you are, there’s still no feeling like experiencing a movie at the theater. I mean you could have your entertainment system at home but neighbors might come knocking on your door (that’s if they’re nice enough. Because too often will they just bang on the walls instead), of course that’s assuming you’re in anything other than a house with no connecting walls.

My first movie experience alone from what I could remember was Ready Player One. And it was a great watch. The only reason this came to fruition was eventually one day none of my friends or any family members were either able to or just wasn’t interested. Plus, a colleague of mine at the time really recommended it. And this might have been the first film I watched without even asking anyone if they wanted to go. Almost like a spurt of the moment thing.

Bar & Restaurant

The only time frame I’m getting from this is sometime after covid. When everything was in full bloom once again and golf courses nowadays are more expensive than they once were pre-covid. When I would doordash, there were so many restaurants I picked up from the food I would deliver just smelled so good. This was the time I did a lot of take-out myself but one day I just decided to dine in.

As I’m writing this, I now realized why I did less take-out and more sit-down. One of the restaurants I ordered from used a lot of packaging that goes to waste. As in you can’t even recycle it even if you wanted to. I didn’t like that. I know I’m just one person, but it was one of the reasons I decided to dine in so I could use actual plates and silverware. Trying to save the planet might be the most difficult task there is. But someone has to do it!

Final Thoughts

Exploring and taking on new adventures, specifically when it’s a solo one can be nerve wrecking. But from my experience, overall I really do enjoy it. Like when I did the wine and canvas, I was a bit closed off yet still managed to make small talk with my fellow painting neighbor. With the restaurant, on average I would go maybe once a week to every other but one of my servers took to my company so much she invited me out to a bar where they had a few DJs playing house music. And same goes for the movies. Had the leap not been taken, who knows what else I would have missed out on, big screen or with just life altogether.

There are still many things I plan on doing alone just for the purpose of it being a new experience, whether I have done it before or not. And depending on what it is there’s a chance you can get in touch with who you are as a person. Maybe you’ll find out things about yourself you never knew existed, and that could be a good thing.

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Making Progress

Let’s talk about where I’ve been or what I’ve been up to these last… I don’t even know. The reason why I haven’t been posting. Instead of going into details about the what, I’d like to try something different, if I may.

A while back, when I started my blog, I wanted share with everyone stories and experiences of my life. Everything that I could remember that was worthy of sharing, no matter how silly or dumb it was, to possibly something relatable to you. Or at least something that got your attention about me and what I went through. The thing was, in the early stages of my writing, I would be all over the place. Wanting to write about so many different topics not necessarily having anything to do with my life (which isn’t a bad thing). And with that I had trouble completing what I would call my assignment. I wanted to write about everything that I forgot to write about anything. And that’s when I found myself struggling to produce anything valid.

It wasn’t until just recently that going back to the year that I decided to start a blog was a new life I had just created for myself. I carried the memories and all that with me but looked at my life from another point of view. I was changing. Evolving. Learning a lot on my own and rarely from others. And I don’t mean others teaching me a new skill or anything like that. But with life itself. I think most of us go through life learning on our own (at least for me), no matter how difficult it is. I have this tendency to learn the hard way, and not just from my past, but even to this day. Just not as often.

I’m not saying that I don’t like the man that I’ve become, because it got me to explore different jobs apart from what I’m used to. Eventually though, I landed a role that I really enjoy, even though it meant making less than a lot of my more recent jobs prior. Despite that, I haven’t felt this good about myself mentally in a while. But over this time period I have lost some friends from my little evolution, and every so often I do think about them. Others, not so much because I would develop trust issues with people. In the past year or so, I kept trying to explore down my past. Just remembering what made me the way that I was. How clumsy I used to be and how I would be a little too good with self-deprecation. It’s weird how much I miss those things about myself. It doesn’t happen as often as it used to. Guess that’s just part of evolution within ourselves as we age. Some things don’t change though, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

This year, I’m trying something new. From a big part and thank you to my niece, I made a bingo card. Just something I would like to see myself do more of or even trying something new. I figured because it’s on a literal piece of paper and I made sure to have it somewhere I could see it every day. This could be my motivation to actually want to do these things. And I’m trying! It’s slow but it’s progress.

And speaking of progress, that’s what counts. The effort to do something. Even though there’s a lot to conquer with this bingo card, I don’t expect to complete it fully. But I’ll be damned if I don’t at least give it a shot!

My Bingo Card that was made back in February.
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An Eventful Life

Life has been quite eventful already this time of year (2025) as we now enter the month of May. We start off with any Star Wars fans with “…the fourth be with you”, to Cinco De Mayo, nurse’s week and where I spent most of my childhood growing up, the city of Holland. A place where we celebrate not just tulips, but the Dutch culture as well… and a parade! This small but highly populated city, from what I’ve watched with my own eyes grow larger throughout my younger years, is really a gem. Even though, during the tulip time festival week, it may be crowded with tourists, I still find myself going to check out the tulips, and enjoying the food trucks and carnival that come with it. Can’t get enough of those elephant ears!

Did you also know they made a movie about Holland? It stars Nicole Kidman, who I think is wonderful and absolutely gorgeous, and although the film says it’s a psychological thriller, according to the trailer I watched, it had horror vibes. I’m not sure what was implied, but my life there had much different vibes. It was more comedy with notes of drama, adventure with a touch of musical, and cannot forget about romance. Maybe I’ll make my own short film about this city. Everyone does have their own perspective and that’s the beauty of film and media, we’re given a story through the writer/director’s point-of-view.

So anyway, with all that in mind said and done, we can’t forget what this weekend is… Mother’s Day! To my mother, I love you and appreciate all that you’ve done to raise me, even though I was a pain in the ass for just a decent amount of my childhood. Not too much hopefully. I know for a fact I would not be the man that I am today without you. Thank you for being my mom!

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The Right Title

When you’re making up your own story, which can be for a book, movie, or even a blog post, it’s never easy. Sometimes it can be a cinch, but lately for me, it’s been a struggle. No matter how simple or complex the story, I put in the research so I can make it right. The less voids/holes in the plot the better. Of course, it’s not going to be perfect.

However, once I have an idea of the story I’m going for and a little research later, I find myself going further down this sort of rabbit hole of a title. Could be simple or catchy, but I also want to make sure it isn’t copying anyone else’s which I find incredibly difficult (just because I don’t know how the world of copyright works and that it’s everywhere no matter what you do). And by this time, it’s almost impossible to come up with your own title that’s an original, unless of course you make up your own words. Like putting two words together, and somehow unfortunately for me, some made-up words I’ve looked up were also taken. Now I’m at a crossroad. But at this point, I think I’ve just accepted no matter what I decide to make my stories title, it’s my story, and no one else’s.

And that’s currently the story of my life lately…

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How Sleep Affects Your Happiness

As we evolve from being a young adult to adult, sleep starts to become less and less of a factor. And sometimes with that, lack of happiness. Not to say that you’re completely a sad old fart. You may tend to think about your past a bit more and remember some good times you had. But without a goal, constantly thinking of the past isn’t always a good thing. You forget to be present while being in the present. Just know that there are always going to be younger crowds than you and you may end up having to play the role model. Even if you didn’t choose to be, people could look up to you for inspiration.

I used to be that guy that always looked back at my past and wondered what went wrong with me, or why I’m not where I’d like to be in life. And also kept thinking about future plans for myself and think of steps to take to get to where it was, I want to be. But a good friend (and my hairstylist) once told me to live in the moment. And it hit me. There were so many times I was living in the moment and felt great about myself, but I quickly move on from it.

Now, just more recently, I’ve been trying to live my life in the moment and later on would recap my day. I would look back at the positives and if there were any negatives, I would quickly get through that and move on from it. Figure out what was not so great and try to learn from it to be better next time. And anything good, I like to soak that in just a bit longer because it felt great! It’s like I had my own highlight reel for myself like how you would see in pretty much every sport out there.

And to highlight this post, if you’re not feeling as great as you want to be, maybe you just need more sleep! At least we can start there.

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What is Nostalgia?

When you search it up, it basically explains a feeling you get about the past. Something that you miss, which could cause a bit of sadness. But it doesn’t have to be. I know for myself, I’ve only been introduced to a new genre of music (well, new to me) about 5 years ago now. Some call it Synthwave, others will call it Retrowave, and there’s many other names for it too. If you’re big into film and media, then you might recognize that type of music from the show Stranger Things. When I listen to this type of music, it does bring me back to my childhood.

Remembering simpler times of going to the arcade where you could win a fighting game just by button mashing. That or heading to the nearest video store to rent movies on VHS and that slow transition to DVDs. And you would have that forbidden adult room that always made you curious to why you weren’t allowed to go in. “Boobies!” I always claimed to have seen it on the cover but was never really certain. I ran in there once really quick to sneak a peek.

Also, my calves did get quite the workout too. I rode my bike for miles on average almost every day from going to the mall, video store, or the gas station to get slushies or ice cream. I had one of those bikes where you had to pedal backwards in order to stop. No gears, just strength. And don’t get me started on Pizza Hut. For some reason as a kid, it hit differently. I’m not sure if my memory is right about this, but I believe they had this $5 combo deal for a small pizza and drink. And collecting toys from McDonald’s or Burger King was something of its’ own thing too.

The only problem is having that feeling where that life has come and gone. The neon lights were its’ own vibe. Maybe that’s why I really enjoyed the movie Cars so much when Lightning McQueen helped fixed the neon of the people from Radiator Springs. Even though that was before my time, I still had this feeling about it. But I also have a good feeling about being able to bring back some of what we consider nostalgic. If you can do it right, you just might have a big enough fan base that would be willing to bring themselves out to your retro video and arcade store that have gone obsolete.

As much as streaming services have taken over, there are certain movies that you won’t find on certain platforms. And that is the hassle. Having to subscribe to possibly 10 different services or more to watch certain types of movies and TV shows. Next thing you know, you’re spending quite a handful of money a month on these and hardly use most of them. What if the internet went out for a day? As long as you have electricity, you could still have a movie night shuffling through your DVDs or VHSs. But if the internet was also down, you could even have a little fun game night. Whether it’s with board games or bringing out the old Nintendo games that you once had such a blast with your family from way back when.

That’s one of the old feelings I missed a lot with my family, getting together and playing a little Mario Party on the 64. And yes, that can still happen now with who knows what’s going on with the world. We just have to remember to take time for ourselves, each other and keep things simple again from time to time. Take a moment to pause your life, your busy busy life. As overwhelming as it could be, just remember to look after yourself. And don’t forget to bring those close to you along with you on this journey. You got this!

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My Perception of Life: Teenage Years

Life for me as a kid I had one focus: making friends. I didn’t realize it then but looking back at it, that really seemed to be the case. The friends I made growing up I had just one feeling every time we would hang out, and that was happiness. Although I didn’t have many friends, my parents did, and their friends had kids of their own. All these other kids were right around the same age as me and we hung out often. This is one of those situations where you would consider them family-friends. Even though we weren’t related, we still considered each other family.

Teenage Years

One of the first major turning points in my life happened during my high school years. But it wasn’t just one specific thing, it was many things that accumulated. New friendships, my love for cars skyrocketed, and of course, my first high school girlfriend. “Snuggly Bear.” I never called her that, just what she referred to herself in the letters we would write each other. Anyone else remember that? Letters! Seriously, when was the last time you wrote a letter to someone? I write maybe one letter a year.

Anyway, a lot of the friends that I also made, we had so much in common. Things like playing sports, video games, and sometimes we would rent a movie that was more horror-esque and pick characters in them who we would claim as ourselves and see who makes it out alive at the end. Also, another thing with horror-type video games, we would rent them and see how far we can get before having to return them. From what I remember, I was typically the one playing the game while my friends would watch. They were more interested in the viewing aspect while giving me options and observing the gameplay, all while I had to make whatever choices that doesn’t lead to death.

Even though I didn’t get my driver’s license until I was 18, that didn’t stop me from being around cars. My older brother was a great example of that. During the weekends, when he would be working on his car in the garage, the moment I heard tools and other mechanical noises, I would pretty much run out to observe. I feel like the reason I did this was to see if I could learn from anything my brother does. I would ask him about what he would be working on or what modifications he would be doing, while still trying not to bother him too much. At least up until the point when I would have my own car to work on. In these early days, we only had 2 Fast & Furious movies out and during this time I could definitely say that I admired Paul Walker’s taste in cars. To this day, I still can’t afford the cars he drove in the movies, which led me to get the next closest thing… affordably.

With all these things that I mentioned and how great they sounded, maybe you’re wondering where the turning point comes in. Because from what we know, turning points are tendencies for conflict. When it came to school, my education was subpar. Bad grades can only lead you so far in life… or so they say. It helps, but a lot of experience with life in general can open up a lot of opportunities. With my grades not doing so great, my relationship with my friends became a bit bumpy as well. At this time, as much as I loved having friends, I never considered what would happen when we all started to get comfortable around each other.

What I mean by this isn’t just about farting in each other’s faces and seeing who beats who to the punch of saying, “doorknob or safety”, followed by running into the wall trying to avoid getting hit, but welcoming one another in like family. And from my experience with family, we do have tendencies to bicker and poke fun, but when it happened to me with my friends, I took it out of context. I thought maybe they were just making fun of me because of how easy I was to make fun of. And maybe that’s at least somewhat true, but my innocence was sort of taken from me. This meant as we got older, we start getting wiser and more mature… I would put an asterisk on both of those. At least when it comes being a teenage boy, we seemed to be incredibly immature.

After only a short time dating my girlfriend, she would break things off with me. Funny thing, she thought that I was going to break up with her which wasn’t true. But it happened and we talked about trying to get back together which we never did. So, no more Snuggly Bear for me. As I tried to move on, I did put myself out there with other girls. At the time, it seemed like it was preferred that as teenagers, you would rather hangout as a group while getting to know each other better before finding yourselves into a one-on-one situation, which was what I was trying to do. The girls that I asked out said yes and agreed to meet with me only to not show up and I would get stood up, multiple times, multiple girls. Since then, I just been afraid to ask anyone else out for the remainder of my high school career. And so, we move on…

My Perspective

Depending on how long ago since you’ve been a teenager, obviously, you’ve changed and have grown from that person you once were. The parts of you that you didn’t like, you no longer did that. Unless you are living in the past and only want to stay that way, but life doesn’t really work like that. Yes, you can keep certain aspects of your younger self with you. But the biggest takeaway from this in my opinion, is any situation that we find ourselves in, despite how we react to it and how it changes us… that defines who we are. Maybe not completely, but easily when it comes to certain aspects about us.

If I was able to go back and give any advice to my younger self, I would tell myself, “Don’t be so emotional. Learn to relax a bit. People are going to talk and you can either shrug it off or just do what you are going to develop later in your 20s: self deprecation. Trust me, it works! I know you wear your emotions on your sleeve but you’re a great kid… also, quit trying to be right all the time! There’s so much greatness in you and you don’t even know it yet, but you have to figure that out on your own. You can’t be afraid to learn something new. And one last thing: education is important. I know you don’t like it and a good amount of this stuff might not be useful in the future. But a lot of it is… that and you could also use it for trivia night. Did you know there are over 1400 different types of cheese in France?! Anyway, I should get going. One last thing, don’t tell anyone about this and the whole thing about time travel stuff.”

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Has Technology Ruined Traditional Romance?

What would life be like for Cupid in this modern age? Do you think that with smartphones and all these dating apps we have, Cupid has lost his desire to bring lovers together the old-fashioned way? What if I’m Cupid in the flesh and as a mortal? Because I’ll tell you, the last time I was sitting in front of my laptop, I banged my elbow against the table in public… and it hurt. Of course, I was trying not to show any emotion but I’m sure the girl sitting across from me noticed but continued on with her work. Why did I even bring this up? … I really don’t know, but let’s move on!

How Has Dating Changed?

It wasn’t so long ago before the dynamic of dating became what we now know it as: mostly through dating apps. Since the idea of smartphones came into fruition, that changed the entire game. But how so? Is it because almost everything is at such a convenience? If so, maybe that’s just a reason to describe us better. I like to consider myself like the cowardly lion in The Wizard of Oz: no courage. Maybe it’s not just me, as in there are a favorable amount of others that are the same way. But when we have our phones, who knows what we’re capable of? One thing I know for sure, we’re gifted with the creation of art. The amazing things that have been done or said just by having a phone in the palm of our hands. That right there gives us the courage we need to make something beautiful and memorable for others to see.

With this, it could be another reason why dating apps are so convenient. Some people have a way with words that could swoon others leading to love. I’m no poet, but someday maybe. Who knows? Let’s just hope they don’t take advantage of it in ways that leads to broken hearts. Unlike myself, I was never good at using dating apps considering there’s actually a lot of steps that are involved. Like how I’m not much of a picture person (which I’m working on) or let alone, taking selfies. Then there’s my bio with what I’d like others to know about myself where I’m making sure I’m not coming off as too creepy… or not creepy enough? Haha, I really don’t know. Some people have some interesting fetishes in this world, and hey, I’m not judging.

Maybe that’s why I have a higher tendency to have more work crushes in my life. Apps don’t work, I am not the type to go to bars to meet women, so what does that leave me with? Well, I did mention how I could be Cupid himself. My birthday is only 2 days apart from Valentine’s Day and I like to consider the month of February the month of love. Even with all of this, I do start to wonder… maybe I’m just not in a place or time in my life right now for love. It’s not like I’m looking or really trying. However, with that, love seems to find me and I believe it likes to see my reaction. Like how I stumble over my words quite often when I’m nervous around someone I like. That or being clueless to the signs that are being sent my way.

Nothing against those who found their loved ones/companions from these apps, because now it’s become the new normal. And even if that’s not how you met, there are other ways of communicating with someone we’re interested in just from our phones altogether. When it comes to love, obviously somethings working. In just the last couple of decades, Earth’s population went from 6 billion to 8 billion. There’s a whole lot of love going on in this world, and maybe that’s why Cupid decided it was easier to stick with apps. He ran out of arrows!

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The Biggest Lesson I Learned from My First Job

Because I was only 16 when I first started working, mistakes were common but learning lessons was rare. Now, to be clear, I’m not just referring to my jobs. It’s my life altogether. As we stick to the working portion, one thing I know for sure when it comes to retail is you have to have good customer service skills. Other traits and your personality are more of a bonus to have when it comes to making conversation and having a connection.

Going back to my first job, McDonald’s. I’m not exactly sure how I was able to ace my interview but I did. My boss who interviewed me was amazed with my answers, but when it came to the job itself, there was so much to take in being in a fast-paced environment. For the most part, all I had to do was run the register, taking customer orders and greet them with a smile, which I did. However, there was a lack of motivation in my speech and how I was speaking to customers. How I know that: it was what my boss told me when she was letting me go. And unlike what we see in movies and television (at least from my experience), I was never told the words, “you’re fired.” It was almost always, “… we have to let you go” or “do better next time, stupid!” … okay, that last one was made up. But maybe a little transparency isn’t such a bad thing.

I personally prefer honesty, because that gives me insight on what I need to work on. Hence, the transparency. Having constructive criticism on our work is a good thing, but we cannot forget the how of it all. Like how to deliver the message to those so they can understand it and make the necessary adjustments needed to perform better at their jobs. Like I said before, it’s not just with our jobs, career, but with life.

Depending on your relationship and how you are with others, it’s easy to do or say something that could be taken out of context by someone else, just by saying the wrong thing… even if it’s not. That’s why I believe a huge part of conflict comes from misunderstandings. And how we react to it is mainly just our personality and lifestyle. These are the effects of life choices.

The choices we make determine how people perceive us, even if it’s one thing that doesn’t really define us. Unfortunately though, people are also quick to judge. But that’s also what makes us human. Whether it’s being bold in the moment or just trying something new, which I do quite often. And the end result: there are both rewards and consequences. For me, a good chunk of the reward is entertaining people like making them laugh. Then there’s the consequences…

As it may seem like I have this huge list of consequences, I’m pretty sure the positive outcome/rewards are about even, if not more. Like my constant battle with choosing to stay up late and almost every time waking up tired and unmotivated. Again, it’s all choice. The choice we make that has its’ consequences, has its’ rewards, all lead to the potential of having misunderstandings to conflict, and that gives us our personality.

My biggest takeaway from learning that I lacked motivation from my first job made me understood, knowing what I know now, who I was at that moment in my life. Quiet, in my shell and has yet to find my voice in the world. In public, I’m as shy as it gets, which makes it easier for people to take advantage of me, and have. Despite that, when I’m in my comfortable surrounding, I am quite expressive. Being around a smaller group of people or with one other person, I can just have a conversation with nothing held back. And that’s trust. Probably the reason why my inner circle was so small considering my life experiences. I put a lot of trust in people and there were times it backfired, but other times, it was incredibly rewarding.

So, no matter how long it takes you, if you haven’t already, take a moment to yourself to reflect on your life. Whether it hurt you or pleased you, just know, it’s a part of your life and your own. The outcome is what you make of it!

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