Category: Life Events

What If… You’re Not from This World?

Close your eyes… or not. But at least imagine yourself on this incredible planet with what it has to offer. The landscape: like the mountains, rivers, oceans, and all the scenic views to you. It’s just everything that this world has to offer, and all you can do is just soak it in. But it is breathtaking, nonetheless.

The people, the music that they create, and all the things that we know that entertains us. The best way to sum up this world is that Earth is the entertainment capital of, at least the galaxy. So… if you’re wondering if “aliens” have not visited us, it might be because they are in disguised. Think Captain Marvel and the skrulls (shapeshifters). They don’t want to destroy us. They are entertained by us. Which is why they would rather choose to be a part of this world. See what we have to offer. And from my point of view, we have a lot to offer!

You could be a part of this world while not being a part of this world. Video games do that to you. Especially if you’re playing The Sims. It’s just a better version of your life. The only problem is your motivation has been taken away from you (probably blame ‘Story Lord’ on that). Other than that, there’s not much more to say. This world pretty much has a little bit of everything.

My only question is: what do people not from this world have to offer? And when I say this, I am hoping that there are solutions to a lot of unanswered problems that is constantly going on with our planet. But anyway, just something to bring to your attention for no reason. That’s why it’s a ‘what if…’

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Why My Neighbors Might Think I’m Crazy

“He’s talking to himself again.” says the neighbor. “Just ignore him, honey.” their significant other responding. “It’s not like he’s really bothering anybody, I hope…”

The conversation I sometimes think that my neighbors might be having about me. The thing is my home of which is also my office (and the unfortunate part of living in an apartment), is also my sanctum. But I don’t always like to be in my own head, which is why I like to say things out loud. And the beauty of that is it helps with your speech. Especially when you’re out in public or have a job where you almost constantly are talking to people. Someday I would love to talk or perform in front of a crowd. I know it would be incredibly nerve wracking but it’s a goal of mine. Possibly something of a Ted Talk.

Now, getting back to my neighbors, the reason I mention this is that I hear a lot of noise and activities from my surroundings. Half the time it sounds like one of my neighbors is banging on the wall… or ceiling, maybe floor. I really don’t know. When the place is made up of concrete, the noise almost echoes, which makes it all the more difficult to know where it’s coming from. Maybe, as far as I know, I’m not being loud at all. I try to keep my TV volume to what I believe is a reasonable level. I don’t want to consider myself as “that” neighbor.

If the walls just happen to bounce sound that easily where you can be heard, I’m sorry. But there really isn’t anything I can do about that. If not and they are plenty soundproof and it’s just that some people are really that loud themselves, I’m in the clear. Otherwise, hopefully I’m putting on a good show for you. I do try to be as entertaining as I can.

The other thing about talking to yourself out loud isn’t just to practice your speech to see if you’re saying things correctly, but maybe it keeps you from being inside your own head too much. For me, it’s how I like to work. Crafting my passion together but also when I talk to myself, I’m not actually talking to myself. I pretend that I have an audience. Or just another person here with me. What that does is it makes conversating that much easier. But definitely doesn’t make it so difficult which many people do have trouble with. Considering I’m a procrastinating filmmaker, but also my own actor, I’m constantly practicing my speech as well.

With that, as I mentioned before, whether or not I can be heard from my neighbors, I do hope you see what I’m doing as a form of art. Because it is! It’s just taking me a little bit longer to put together a story, a script, the idea to what I want to do. When you do all this by yourself, it is a slow progress. I like to say that my job in this life is to impress the world… and plenty more.

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What Do YOU Think About… in Life?

The billion-dollar question nobody is asking. As I was sitting there on the toilet doing my business and without my phone, I had a moment to think… like what had happened earlier that day at work. A conversation I had with a colleague of mine, whom I was attracted to (not sure if I used that correctly, the whole “who” “whom” thing).

Anyway, Christmas music was on, we sang a little bit, then I told her how in one of my past lives I was Santa Claus. She told me that was not true which led me to explaining to her that I know when people are being naughty or nice. In turn, she laughs but what surprised me the most, and never expected, she tells me she was Mrs. Claus. And that blew my mind, I was caught off guard. So much was going on in my head, but I had to say something. And by the way, what happened next was not my finest hour (which happens a lot), I said a few words which I can’t remember, but all I know is that it was followed by me laughing the words, “ho, ho, ho!”… and just like that, I ruined the moment, again.

As I tried to recover, it was already too late. The moment had passed, and we just ended up going back to working. But also, when I did finally say something after laughing like Santa it was maybe like 30 seconds later. And when you’re in the moment, 30 seconds can feel like an eternity.

Now that you’re all caught up, let’s fast forward to when I was pooping. When I was sitting there, the thought of what happened at work crossed my mind again. What I think about almost always is what I could have done differently. That and put myself in similar scenarios so I could prepare for a next time that almost never happens. The thing about these moments in life is that most of the time, you only get one.

I couldn’t help but think what was going through her mind; “Does David like me?” “Maybe he’s not interested?” Especially how I reacted to her perfect Mrs. Claus response. As I’m trying to look at this from her perspective, she’s throwing me these vibes that I’m so clueless to figure out. Not right away at least. All I know is that I don’t know. Only what seems to be, and that is she made her move and I failed to see it.

The countless times I play these scenarios in my head for what could be possible is that I want to impress her. The fact that I put so much time and thought into this can only mean that I really care about her. Because I want things to go right, but when it actually plays out, it’s so much better. I just mess it up, terribly! Opportunity can literally come knock on my door, and I’ll be too clueless to figure it out.

Basically, my love life in a nutshell.

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When Your “CRUSH” Doesn’t Feel the Same Way

For however long you’ve known each other, almost every moment you’re together, you just want to ask them out. But before that even happens, you role play a little bit by yourself. Trying to put together all these different scenarios in your head, or out loud while you’re in the car, at home, or wherever you find the time to. Yet despite everything you’ve played out, when that moment actually happens, nothing goes according to plan. Not a single thing you mentioned was used or expressed leaving you in a vulnerable position. Even if you never got around to asking them out, there’s no subtleness anymore, so you’ve made it clear to them that you like them. And in return, you get the same end results, again… and again. Getting crushed by your crush…

Although it isn’t a heartbreak, it definitely feels that way. Your body will feel cold, and not because of the weather. But rather your entire universe has been shattered. Almost like your soul has momentarily left your body so you feel nothing but a vast emptiness inside. The only reason you had these feelings in the first place is because you read the signs of interest. At least you thought that’s what they were. The pieces just kept piling on that you couldn’t help but believe that’s what was going on. The chemistry’s there and you built this connection with each other you were almost certain they were interested. Your confidence is at its’ all time high until you finally make your move only to be devastated by the news that you are more than familiar with.

Sadness kicks in, a feeling of lost. All those feelings you remember having back when you were depressed just right back to where they once were. You even made yourself a music playlist for when this moment would come back (that’s right! I made myself a playlist for when life just sucks and I’m feeling down). Every time you do get better; you tell yourself you don’t want to go back to that feeling. That feeling you’re way too comfortable with. Being alone and an outcast from just about everyone in your life. It happens far too often and sometimes you just let yourself know you won’t fall for anyone again. Maybe love isn’t for everyone. At least not in an intimate way. I’ve never been good at asking anyone out and I believe now there’s a reason for that.

So, how do you move on? If you’ve been there before you’ll know how. It takes time. Do the things you have to do, but this time you’re more responsible. If you have to drink, then drink. If getting high is your thing, by all means. Me? I listen to sad music, watch sad movies, pour myself a drink or two, or three. Sometimes you have to feel miserable before getting better. But you will get better. You always have. It hurts, but you will get through it…

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(My) Office Romance I

There’s no denying the sexual tension between you and at least one of your colleagues, at least during one point in your working career. I’m sure to any The Office fans out there, or at least have watched enough, you know about Jim and Pam’s relationship. All that tension they had and build up before getting together. A lot of people have fantasized that being them, unless of course you’re married or in any other status. But there’s nothing wrong with looking. We’re human. It’s in our nature to wonder. And then there’s curiosity. If you let that take control of you, then you’ve cheated on your partner. As always, I’m getting beside the point. However, if you are single then curiosity is welcomed. It’s just the matter of having the courage to asking out this individual that makes you feel vulnerable inside. And that’s where I come in…

Work History

Since graduating high school, I spent the next several years working from one job to another, and another. So much so, the number of jobs I’ve had is somewhere over 30. I stopped keeping track when I got to around 25 or so. With some of these jobs however, I did happen to find attraction towards my coworker. Whether or not we worked together or just being in the same building. Like to the point I would turn my head so far over I’ll end up running into something. Time moved a bit slower for me, music playing inside my head, and then I would end up missing out on yet many other opportunities. Mostly because since time slowed down for me while the music is in the background, to everyone else time was moving normally. So, they would just pass on by without even knowing I existed. At least that’s what I figured at the time. I know, I’m aware of how sad that is. But on the other side, these stories do have an ending.

First Job Crush

Let’s take a look at my first official job I started out at. I was 16 and started working at McDonalds. How I got this job, I have no idea, at least at the time. Crushing the interview only to see me in my true nature in the public. Being this quiet, shy, cute (I could go on…) young teenager working in a fast-paced environment. I worked as a cashier, but it was short lived considering 3 weeks was how long I was a McDonald’s employee before getting let go. My boss at the time said I didn’t appear to be motivated enough in the establishment. Which I don’t blame her for that. I knew I wasn’t. Especially being quiet and shy. Times were different for me back then. But during my 3 weeks there, I just so happened to have stumbled upon what I believe, was an angel. She was this stunning blonde with an aura that lit up my eyes working the drive-thru window. The music that was playing in my head at the time was probably Boyz II Men’s I’ll Make Love to You. I was hardcore into R&B at the time so it’s safe to say I knew all about that baby making music, even though I was still a virgin. But all of that was a never was. Like I mentioned before, I only worked there for 3 weeks so I had no clue if she was single or dating someone. She did ask me something during a time we were slow at work, but I forgot what it was. Thinking about it now, she was probably just trying to make conversation and wanted to get to know me a little better. Unfortunately, never got a chance to find out too much more. It was what felt like another lifetime ago.

When it comes to having your first job, depending on who is raising you, ask them first. Figure out if you’re ready to get out there in the world. Out in the eyes of the public. Although, there are many negatives and cruelty with the public, there are also positives and even enlightenment. You could learn so much from a job, and not just what you learn at home and at school. Just like how I learned about Angels existing right in front of me. Unless my eyes are cheated by some spell. But only 10 or so feet away working the drive-thru.

Stay tuned for part II…

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The Problem with SOCIETY… from My Point-of-View

When we have issues with each other, what do we typically do? We talk about it. It’s that simple… but it’s not. Our emotions, how we feel inside, we’re too afraid to tell anybody. Unless for the most part it’s your shrink. And of course, when we’re in our vehicles. Everyone is probably at their most expressive being in their car. Yelling at other drivers for something that half the time is really their fault and not the other person. But face to face interactions, that’s a whole different story.

The majority of the world are strangers to you. So, the question is, do you really want to perceive yourself as more of a hostile person? Why not be caring or shine some light to those who need it, stranger or not. Take your neighbors as a great example. I’m sure most of us don’t even talk to all or a lot of them. If they do something that irritates or bothers you enough, is it so difficult to just go over, knock on their door, and hopefully politely let them know? Because chances are they are unaware of what’s going on around them.

Why My Neighbors Might Think I’m Crazy

I live alone in an apartment. That means I share a hallway and walls with my neighbors. I always wonder too many times if I’m being too loud. I’d hate to be that neighbor everyone has to deal with. Is my TV on too loud? Do the walls constrict sound pretty well? Or can everyone hear it when I talk to myself all the time? I know I sound crazy, but I talk to myself to practice my speech. I interact with people almost every day, mostly customers and other employees. It’s a method that I use so I’m not constantly inside my own head and stressing about anything and everything.

Another big issue I feel my neighbors might have with me is that about once a week I would go out for a smoke. Weed that is (I know I said I stopped but this time feels different). I would end up spraying some cologne on myself and take a quick drive to air it out before coming back home. The problem is that the scent from the weed more than likely is still on me, and I would leave a trail of the smell walking in thru the hall. If that’s so, my neighbors know it’s from me, leading them being angry. Like a lot. I think one of my neighbors might be trying to drill through the concrete wall in hopes that it’ll collapse on me. Also, that is me being paranoid. Which is why I really have to stop smoking, so I don’t have these thoughts in my head anymore. I have heard some of my neighbors saying something (but couldn’t quite make out specifics) and it hurts me because no one had the nerves to just come knock on my door to tell me to my face.

Overall

It’s easy for people to get along. But just as easy for them to languish. Why something so simple as just telling someone what’s bothering them is like the biggest risk anyone has to take. I love watching movies and television shows. And what I learn from them is that whenever there’s a conflict or tension, the characters find the time to talk it out with each other. In my world, it’s almost the complete opposite. We think just because something is only a movie or TV show that there’s no takeaway from it. But that’s not true at all. Take a lesson in your life from this, know that they are trying to tell us something. We can hear just fine. But we don’t listen. All I’m trying to say is talk to each other. But have manors and be polite. There’s no need to take something this small and turn it into everything it’s not. Like The Beatles said… “Come Together.” Because we need it now more than ever.

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How My Day Went… Waking up at 3:30am

When you work at a coffee shop (especially if you open), you’re going to have to wake up pretty early. Depending on what time the store opens, you have responsibilities that may involve some prepping and other opening duties. I don’t typically open. The only reason I did this time was to cover for a colleague of mine. And one of my weaknesses is when being asked in person to do something, like stay later, or in this scenario, cover for someone that meant opening, I have a difficult time saying no. Unless obviously I can’t. So, even despite knowing that I have to go into work early, the night before I already knew I wasn’t going to bed earlier than normal. In which, there was going to be lack of sleep.

The Morning Of…

Alarm goes off, and surprisingly I’m not terribly exhausted. I have my morning routine that I do, then I’m out the door and headed to work. I made sure to let my colleagues know that this was my first time opening since my training (which was probably a good 6 months prior), that way they are prepared in case I make many mistakes. For the most part everything went alright. But I did notice some differences; I don’t normally work the middle of the week, so when it came to talking to customers, I was a bit thrown off. It’s not like I can ask them how their weekend was or what they have plan for the weekend. It’s too… in the middle of the week for that! So, for the rest of my shift I was very one dialogue type of person. Like an NPC in a video game. Fortunately though, I got out of work much earlier and that gave me a lot more time to do a little Doordashing.

It was one of my best dashes I had during lunch time. For the most part it went smoothly. And afterwards, I had the rest of the afternoon and night to myself. Mostly just to relax. I was proud of myself yet knew I didn’t want to do that again. Just because I interact with customers quite often and it really did get to me a bit. Stumbling my words here and there, and not knowing what else to say when most customers are just getting coffee and heading into work. To summarize, it was really repetitive. However, felt like a lesson in life when communicating with people. This made me want to open up more topics to discuss with customers while they’re waiting for their order. But I will say, I slept great that night.

So long, from a non-morning person!

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My First Vegas Experience

Strip club, check… welp, and that’s it for my list! Haha, almost. Not that it was planned, it did happen though. One of the first things I did there was placed a $100 bet on black (Roulette) and the plan was to let it ride a few times. So, first hundred and the ball is spinning. As it plinkos its’ way to a stop, it was black. Up 100, I knew what had to be done next. “Let it ride!” The Plinko game returns. And what do you know, winner winner, chicken dinner! Now I’m up to 400 total and this was when everything changed. I hesitated. Instead of telling the dealer to let it ride, I paused a bit longer and ended up taking 200 out leading me at +100 in which the ball landed on red. That little bit of hesitation was what probably determined if I could have left there with $800 and the strip club would have been free, or leaving with -100. But we’ll never know. Instead, I ended up spending most of my expenditures at one place, which led me to borrowing money from a friend. Oh boy! Yeah, that happened.

Other than doing a lot of walking, which was great for my Fitbit and my health, we did catch ourselves an Adam Sandler break when we needed it. There was a marathon going on, even at the hotel we stayed at before our flight in had it going on. That was pretty cool. Except for when we were waiting in the car while one of our buddies was checking us in at the hotel. I was in the middle seat and one of the guys farted and I caught a big wind of it. We had to escape from the car which in turn led to me throwing up. Yeah, that was wild. So anyway, the Vegas. On our last night there, we were playing blackjack at the ole O’Sheas. Lady luck was on my side that night. Made enough to pay back my friend and had enough to eat again. What a win for me! Came in clutch. Although, we did have to stay an extra night to do so. Our flight got cancelled from a winter storm. So, we’ll think of it as overtime.

And that, everyone, was my first Vegas experience.

Until the second time…

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The Untold Story: About Life… so far

When it comes to people, how do you know you can trust them? Like really. I’m not trying to start anything or initiate some wrongdoing. All I’m saying is whenever you’re doing or saying something and people, whether they are your friends, family, or coworkers, they without letting you know might have more to express about you behind your back. Unfortunately, I’ve been in some similar situations. The problem is the individual or multiple people that are involved don’t say anything to you. And that’s where and when the problem begins. If you’re a very open-minded and observant person, you’ll notice some things. The truth is, all you expect in return is the truth. People to tell you when something is wrong, or when you may have something to do with the problem. Those are the people that I respect. But the issue I have is when things are unsaid. I’ve spent more than enough of my life to know that if something is wrong, I would like to know about it. That’s why anyone who tells me anything, I respect them whole heartedly. But then there’s the people who decide to keep things to themselves. Or at least with those they feel are close to them. How do you expect a relationship to be stronger if you can’t even tell the person you feel who is bothering you about a problem what’s wrong?

I’m sure a lot of this has to do with overthinking, but sometimes my overthinking personally has been right. But it’s been wrong at times… and then there’s your gut. When you have a gut feeling about something, like the old saying says… “go with your gut” or something like that. I honestly don’t know any more at this point. Everyone lives their own lives. There’s only so much we can do to change it. Pastors, Motivators, Phycologist, Teachers and whatnot. At some point in our lives, we need to be aware of what we know. And what we can change to better ourselves as human beings. Life is short. Make the most with what you have to work with. Just be sure it’s something positive and can give hope for generations to overcome adversity.

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Beans

Whether we’re talking coffee beans, food beans, or women beans… (Oh boy here we go, “get it together David!”) it needs to be taken care of with love, passion, and tenderness. I work at a coffee shop and every time I use the rest room, there it is! A picture frame of a coffee bean. My mind goes to one place, and then my tongue to another. Hahaha no, not like that. I wouldn’t actually lick the artwork. It’s my mind that goes there. It’s like a subliminal message. Just because it’s been a while doesn’t mean you have to rub it in my face Universe.

Any who, coffee beans and beans you eat, not eat out, are just as important. The time and patience you have to put in to make sure you have a good quality bean, whether it’s light, medium, or a dark roast matter. And if you’re making something like a white chicken chili matters too. I personally would throw all that in a crock pot, set it, and forget it! At least for 4-8 hours, depending on if your cooking temperature is on low or high.

No matter what the bean, take care of it. Because in the end, it’s there to satisfy your thirst or hunger. Whether it’s low calorie or not.

(I may have had a little too much whiskey… but also not enough. Happy 4th of JULY!!!)

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