Category: Life Events

Restaurants: Hosts, Servers & More

Where do I begin? While my memory of this is still pretty fresh, I’d like to get some things off my chest. And let me just say, for the sake of argument, this is from my personal experience. Everywhere else I’m sure is different but at the same time has its’ similarities. Let’s go into the restaurant business, the place of where I work but will not say what business for legal purposes. Not that the place of where I work is important, rather it’s the people, as is anywhere else. 5 months. That’s how long I’ve worked in this establishment. And on a few occasions, I wanted to quit due to the people. But I stuck around because I knew I needed the money and I had to keep the roof over my head and my stomach well fed. With that being said, let’s get right to it!

Life of A Host

Here at my job, I have only so many responsibilities; greet the guests, seat them, bust and wipe tables, and a few other things. That’s pretty much it. Which makes sense why host positions only make so much money. They don’t have to deal with guests like the servers do, which I will give them the benefit of a doubt of having to deal with all sorts of people. Some people will do whatever they can just to get a free meal, while others will kindly make your life easier and tip you very well. Pretty much one of those two or anything in-between. Now, depending on where you work, you could either be just a host, bust person, or both. In my situation I do both. But to clarify my position the best is that when I bust tables, I have to take care of almost anything that isn’t plates and bowls. Pretty much I have to take care of trash like napkins and wrappers, then cups and silverware. Either way, the job is easy, but it’s the repetitiveness of the job that takes a toll on you. This is where the position of a server makes or breaks you (and it depends on the person). They will do their job well, or not at all. With some servers, I find myself doing their jobs more often than I should. When they see that I’m picking up after them, some, not all, are going to take advantage of the situation. They will expect you to do that part of their job all the time because they know they can get away with it. Less work on their part, right?! I get it. I’m just a host. But that’s not the point I’m trying to make at all. We’re all human-beings, or I’d like to think we are. Taking advantage of someone was never how I was raised, and I would be ashamed of myself if I knew I did that to others. I’d like to say I see everyone as equals. No one should be above anybody else (in a perfect world).

So, on this particular day, I had worked a day I don’t typically work, and several of my colleagues (servers) did exactly just that. Left the plates and bowls piled up at their section. Even after I would ignore cleaning up their tables for some time, nothing was picked up. Eventually I caved in. I took care of their plates, their bowls, and cleaned the table and got them sat with more guests, like nothing ever happened to them. I was aggravated! I was ready to walk out of my job, but I knew in the back of my mind that I needed this job, despite how little I was getting paid. Actually, the pay wasn’t terrible considering I would get a tip-out. It was more my position than anything else. I could be wrong, but it seems like most people don’t respect the host position, like all they do is greet and seat guests from any other perspective. We do have conversations with the guests as well and on top of that, other responsibilities too! One thing I know about being a host is that if you don’t do your job correctly, we, as hosts, have the power to get servers more seats or not. So, don’t f**k with us! Otherwise, I won’t hesitate to skip your turn when rotation is up. We’re here to do our jobs just like anyone else. Don’t get me wrong, there are some colleagues of mine that I enjoy working with. We all do our part and life goes on. “Out of sight, out of mind.” That reference hits me in another way. If you do your job to the best of your abilities, a lot of people won’t think twice about what you do. Clean tables and chairs well enough, no one will know how dirty it may have been before you sat there. Like water under the bridge.

Narcissism

Where don’t you see this? From colleagues to superiors, it’s all the same. The title doesn’t matter, it always comes down to specifics, and that’s every person as an individual. Unfortunately, I’m dealing with a manager that is this way. I’m sure many of you can relate when I say this, but when I’m having a “conversation” with someone, and they tend to go on a rant about their life or anything that’s brought up by them, once you mention something that correlates with the topic that they say, they will immediately cut you off before you can barely get a few words out. Everything always has to be about them. Nothing you say matters to their eyes and ears. The way I see it, they seem to need it more than I do. Basically, what I’m trying to say is if when I’m trying to tell a story or say something that relates to what they’re going through, and they aren’t having it, on multiple occasions and I pick up on that, I’m done! I don’t care anymore about what they tell me because from past experiences, all these types of people tend to care about is themselves. (I will go more into details about this in the next post) And just so we’re all in an understanding, I’m getting my information based off real life experiences. People that I deal with on almost a daily basis. Whether they pretend to care or just walk away once they’re done getting what they need to get off their chest.

This leads me to my next subject. I know my time working in a restaurant establishment is very short, but that doesn’t mean the way I see things means my mind doesn’t take things in quickly. In layman’s term, it doesn’t take me long to figure out about how people are with one another and in the work environment. I see past the bulls**t because there are, or should I say were, people in my life that were the same way. Those that pretend to care about me when I’m most certain talk about me behind my back because I tend to be very honest and calling them out on their b.s. I find my life not to be that interesting, but things still happen. To these types of people, they will find a way to change the story to make it sound like something you would see in a movie. Always over the top (at least with most action movies).

What Have We Learned?

Life will go on. No matter how much it affects us. People will be… well, people. You never know what to expect except that you should expect the possibilities that anything is possible. It’s quite a mouthful, I know. But the truth is gossip never sleeps but you do. And when you’re sleeping, you’re dreaming. Dreaming of wherever inception takes you. Whatever the situation, you’re chasing your dreams. Going after what matters and making the most of your life. Don’t ever let anybody steer you down the wrong path, because it’s just obstacles in the way of your success.

Whatever is in stored for me and my future, I just know that I will make the most with what I have to work with. Through the good times and bad, it’s memories I’m capturing and using as fuel for the fire that burns within me… or just another great story to tell. And if you still haven’t learned anything from this post, learn this; people will be people. Pay close attention to who your real friends are, because they are the ones that will be there for you during the hardest times and will be there to celebrate with you during the best of times. Ooh-Rah!

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Missed Connections

Is it possible to find love in the most unlikely of places? From coffee shops to gyms, to bars and dating apps, not that these are considered unlikely. I guess in my situation I wouldn’t call it love but definitely a feeling that made me yearn for more. Let’s take it back about 10 years to when this story began… It’s the weekend and I was out with a friend at a club downtown. And there she is. Just glowing in my eyes. The aura that she carries around her just ever so naturally. Standing out in front of everyone else (at least to me). As she glances my way, I give her “the look”. She then proceeds in my direction and introduces herself. “Hey, I’m Daisy!” From there we conversed for a little bit then I went out for a dance with her. She had on what I believe was this silky light brown sweater and one of the cutest smiles I’ve seen. Now, because this was around 10 years ago, I don’t remember exactly what happened. All I know is not long after our dance we parted ways, and I would never see her again. There is one thing I left out though… Daisy was a dancer at a strip club. Which brings me back to the unlikely of places on finding love. She was really sweet to me and might have been the best $20 I’ve ever spent. After hindsight has kicked in, I’m sure her being sweet and nice to me was just part of her job. But I refuse for that being the truth. So, Daisy (if that’s your real name), I just want you to know that it was more than just a dance. And hope you’re doing well with your life, considering Lady Godiva has been shut down now for some time.

VIP

I had just recently turned 21 and down the road from where I was living at the time was a nightclub. They were fairly new to the area but would only be opened for so many years. Seems I have a tendency to shut down clubs… literally. Anyway, we were celebrating my brother’s birthday. He likes to do things pretty big, and we most certainly did it big. I’m talking VIP and bottle service big. So, there I am with my friends and family making memories. I wandered around the club for a while (mainly because I got lost), and when I ended back up on the dance floor, I found people I knew and just started dancing. Looking back to this day, my cousin’s baby daddy was a really good wingman because he pulled me in to dance with this girl he was originally dancing with. She must have liked what I had to offer because we were getting down, and these hips don’t lie. We were making babies on that dance floor! And I remember what Will Smith’s character Hitch would say, “women relate dancing to sex.” It got to the point we were kissing right in the middle of the floor. One of the wildest things I’ve ever done in public. Afterwards, we left and started talking very briefly. I mentioned to her how my brother got us a VIP room in which I had no idea where it was. She would tell me how she was with people that were doing the same thing. This is where the alcohol blurred my memory a bit because something was said, and she gave me one last kiss before walking out the main entrance. It didn’t occur to me that that’s where we were at. It was so confusing being in the club that night not knowing where anything was. I always wondered if she was expecting me to chase after her or if she was just having a bit of fun. I guess we’ll never know.

Clueless

Maybe love just isn’t for me. Or maybe I have to be patient and just let everything fall into place when it has to, or I’m just not ready. Whether this is the Universe teasing me with potential mates or somebody Good Luck Chucked me, I don’t know what else to say. And on the rare occasions (and most likely this one) I’m just really clueless most of the time, for over the past decade at least. I’m happy to say I’m slightly more aware now! But before that, when I was at an amusement park with my old roommates, I yet again blew another opportunity. Heading into the day my friend’s girlfriend had a friend she wanted to introduce me to. So, at this point I was given the notice. After spending a couple hours already at the theme park and some time at the water park, my mind went blank for a moment. Because when I was finally introduced to this sexy young thang, our meet and greet was short lived. I had forgotten that I was there to meet a possible future ex and in the great words of Billy Madison and the guys from South Park would say, “YOU BLEW IT!” I sure did. My life in a nutshell. Although, I will score a touchdown from time to time, I seem to be better at handing the ball off… or fumbling at the goal line.

So, what can I take away from these past experiences, other than my life can be summed up by memes and gifs? Opportunities are always going to happen. How we handle a situation builds our characters as individuals. Pretty much makes us who we are today, why we have the friends we do, and how our family sees us. But who’s to say we can’t find love from a dancer at a strip club? Or grinding with a sexy little minx at a nightclub. Probably most people. But that’s not the point! Even though for me that feeling is felt more towards my crotchural region. It doesn’t deny the fact that we could find love just about anywhere. From any situation. Even if you’re shaking it for dollar bills (which I have done in the past myself). It’s not where or how you meet your potential, rather it’s getting to know each other along the way. No matter what the outcome may be, at least you’ll have one great story to tell.

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My Past Year

Another year has come and gone while some, if not most of us, has been yet again unproductive. So, what do we do to change it? Do we want to change it? I guess it depends on the lifestyle we want to live with what we would consider we’ll be happy with, content, or driven for more. Let’s face it, as we get older, life tends to become weirder. For the majority, we work to make a living and to support ourselves and even our family. Whatever the case, I spent most of this year figuring out what it is exactly that I wanted to do with my life. And I’m still searching for it working at several different jobs. All of these that are new for me and not what I’m looking for. But I need that steady paycheck to keep a roof over my head and my stomach happy. From trying to be a sales rep walking around a store trying to convince people to buy what I’m selling, to working in the restaurant business for the first time in my working career.

2021 Recap

After 8 years of a wild roller coaster ride of a job, I finally called it quits. A lot of things, if not all, has to come to an end. If this was a television show, I spent 8 seasons with this company entertaining my fellow colleagues and bosses to the best of my abilities. But being somewhere so long only to stay in the same spot and not move up is pretty dreadful. My hard work was overlooked so many times. I was given a lot of added responsibilities only to not receive any benefits or incentives. That’s probably the reason why I would barely make it to work on time most days. I had no reason, no motivation to get to work early and be ready to work. And with Covid-19 being a factor, spending some time doing a little soul searching, I was ready to do something different. Being that I’m a people person, I wanted to try my hand working in that field. I became a sales representative, but this was nothing like what I expected. Thinking I would have my own office space and possibly talking to people on the phone or scheduling meetings was not even close to what I actually did. I was put in a store where I had to walk around constantly going from customer to customer trying to sell them a product that was more miss than a hit. Once a potential customer would say no, we would then have to move on to the next. This wasn’t something that I liked at all. I would rather take the time to getting to know people and having an honest conversation with them. Instead, I had these lines I had to recite and memorize to pitch to people. It felt a lot like being an actor for a role and I had to say these lines I didn’t like. I’m more of an improvisor and so this job only lasted about a week.

For pretty much the rest of the year, I would end up working part-time at a couple restaurants. Getting the feeling of what customers are like in this establishment. I have to tell you, it’s pretty wild. There’s no knowing what to expect except that you should expect anything. You will have people who are really nice and sweet, to those that can be the rudest of all. This is just my point of view, but I’m sure most people who work in restaurants can say the same, but customers tend to look down on people working in these establishments. What people do in their homes is their business. But when you see how they are in public and how they treat those who handle their food, only makes me wonder how depressing their lives are (yeah, I said it). I’ve seen the movie Waiting… and I know better than to cause issues to those who service me. Unless service is bad, which I’ve dealt with on multiple occasions, then they will know it by how little I tip them. It really is that simple. But my responsibilities are different. At one job I’m taking phone calls and orders, while the other I’m a host. Greeting guests, busting and cleaning tables, and other tasks. And I’m crushing it! Only been at this host job for a couple months and they already have me training new workers for that position. I will admit that there are only so many jobs I suck at, and this is not one of them.

Resolution

We all make them from time to time. But how often do we succeed at going after these goals we make for the year? Every year it’s almost always the same for me; gain weight and workout more. Obviously, I’m doing something wrong. Since Covid, I have been struggling to do both and saying that I want to or need to hasn’t changed anything. All I know is my health is the most important thing to me so I’m going to start with that. The next thing I want to focus on is a job that not only will I like but also one that will pay the bills. Although I’m still in search for what it is I really want to do with my life, I’ll keep on pushing forward because that’s all I can do. Eventually, sooner rather than later though, I will find what it is I’m looking for that will make me happy and successful. That’s what I’m going to fight for this coming year. Finding my stride to life and doing the things that I’m passionate about. Happy New Year and be safe!

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Happy Holidays

As long as I could remember, Christmas was my favorite holiday. Just something about the lights, decorations and movies to name a few. But probably most important, that time away from school. And as I got older and started working, I would save my vacation days for this time as well. I love the winter and the snow. Driving in it, not so much. Not because of me, but because of other drivers. I’m the type of person that will find an empty parking lot and do donuts and snow drifts in. Typically, at my place of employment. Seeing the snow fall and covering up the grass and roads used to be nice, until I had to drive in it. It’s not like I could hope for a snow day at work. Unfortunately, life doesn’t work that way as an adult trying to keep a roof over my head. And with that, my holiday spirit seems to get lower and lower as the years go by. My childhood memories about Christmas began to fade. I hardly remember anything when I was younger about the holidays. Work consumed me. It’s no wonder why I’m miserable.

To some people I’m sure, they’re just trying to get through the holidays and others are just excited about it. Me? Well… that’s something I’m still trying to figure out. I do see my family and when we get together, we end up watching basketball and of course, have dinner. I do remember I used to try to get everyone their own unique presents. Taking the time to see what each individual family member of mine’s interests are. And I know it’s not about the presents but being whole as a family. My holiday spirit was so high at one point. Lately, the older I got the more it went down and the less buying presents happened. We would just end up buying each other scratch-off tickets and hope for the best. After doing a little soul-searching, I knew hoping for a lucky hand of scratch-offs or winning the lottery wasn’t going to be the way I get my success. I had to work for it. I had to earn it. Which I’m still doing to this day. Looking at what’s out there that’s right for me to make a change that’ll make me happier overall.

My Christmas Tradition

Since about a while ago, I started this tradition every year around Christmas to watch holiday movies. Almost every day during December I would put on one of these festive movies to get myself in the spirit. And what better way to compliment that with a nice cup of hot chocolate. Life was pretty simple during these times. I did almost my best to try to fatten up so I could hibernate for a little bit while I would be off work for my winter break. That didn’t work out so well. But I’m not giving up! And to go back to holiday movies, or movies that take place during the holidays, I still have yet to see A Christmas Story and Die Hard. It’s funny I mentioned that because the only Die Hard film I ever watched was Live Free or Die Hard.

Movies like Home Alone which I’m sure I’ve watched about 50 times I recently did something different this last time around (that I know of). I watched it from another perspective. Nothing major. Just things that are more thought provoking. Like how the drivers kept running into the statue. That statue broke! At least when the van hit it. There’s a chance this could have been in part 2. And taking a crowbar to the chest with that much force would more than likely break some bones among other things. But then again, this type of movie was not meant to be realistic. With Christmas Chronicles, is magic considered what science will be in the future? Inside Santa’s bag is a portal to his workshop/North Pole. Using something similar to Pym particles to get in and out of chimneys and houses quickly. These are just some of many theories I have when it comes to watching movies. Specifically, Science Fiction. Something I’m looking forward to breaking down in future posts (or videos).

Anyway, whether you are celebrating the holidays alone, with friends, and/or family, try to look at the positives in life. It can be difficult with so much or little going on we forget to see things on a lighter side. As long as you’re healthy and capable, keep pushing forward to a better tomorrow. The year is almost over, so why not start now?

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How I Burnt The Thanksgiving Turkey

Life is full of surprises, and you never really know what’s going to happen next. All you can do is be prepared and learn from each and every situation. Whether it’s something on your end or not, mistakes help us grow and become a better person. Just like the mistake I made when I burnt the family turkey. And yes, it’s finally that time of year I share this story.

For Thanksgiving I had taken on the role for making the turkey for my family. I took this responsibility almost 10 years ago. Luckily for me, that’s all I had to worry about, nothing else. The role used to go to my brother-in-law before it became too much of a hassle for him considering he had other additional things to make. I volunteered to make the turkey because I knew my mom was allergic and the turkey cannot be cooked in the household. I wasn’t living at home anymore at this point so it made sense. Plus, I felt like it would be a good opportunity to take on something new. Now I’m not exactly sure how many times I made the turkey, but there was one year where I undercooked it. This had to have been my first or second attempt at it. At that moment I was still considered a beginner in the kitchen. However, I’d like to say nowadays I’m very skilled. It only takes time and practice to become good at anything, as long as you are willing to put in the effort.

In The Clouds

After a few opportunities at making the turkey, I was doing pretty well. At this point in my life, I was living with some of my friends I made back from grade school. For those of you who don’t know, the day before Thanksgiving is the biggest bar night of the year. I had gone out to that a few times, but this one particular year I decided to stay in. One of my roommates, Vincent, had a coworker that gave him this cookie edible. It was pretty small in size and if I remembered correctly, we never tried edibles before. So this was definitely going to be quite the experience. I’d like to say also that I hardly ever smoked marijuana prior to this event, so I had no tolerance for this at all. One of our buddies, Eddie, came over to partake in this activity with us. The plan we had was to try it and play Civilization V. We were pretty hooked on this game for a moment. So Vincent cut the cookie into about 8 small pie sized pieces and the 3 of us took one each. The cookie was very potent because when you would bite into it, you didn’t really taste the cookie at all. It was all Mary Jane! Then we started playing the game and after about half an hour in we didn’t feel anything. So second round of the cookie down the hatch and from there, it was alright, alright, alright!

About an hour after we took the edibles, everything just became a blur. I could not function properly. I’m pretty certain I blacked out a little bit too. All I know was Vincent and I took the last 2 pieces. Now that I am remembering it correctly, we skipped the tripping out faze and went to blackout mode. That was for me at least. Eddie, who should have just crashed on the couch ended up driving home. I later found myself in the bathroom having to pee. As I was going… I couldn’t stop. The flow was constant for what felt like 2 minutes which is an eternity in the peeing aspect of things. All I know was that I no longer wanted to go and made the decision to pull up my pants. Did not care if I was still peeing or not. Just hoping for the best! After that, I was rinsing my face with water then just staring at myself in the mirror. They say nobody who has ever used marijuana had died from it(that’s what I heard at least). I thought that was about to change that night.

Long story short… we didn’t have turkey that year. I was still in the clouds the next day. Never knew you could be high for longer than a day. I eventually made it to my mom’s later that night. Half the family had already left to go black Friday shopping and I’m over here struggling to eat anything. It was like a hangover. I only told my sister about what had happened, and I’m sure she let everyone else know why there was no turkey for Thanksgiving.

Extra Crispy

Let’s go back a few years from now. I was living with Ross and his wife at the time. Ross and I were at Lowe’s looking around for something when we came across a deep fryer they had setup for anyone that wanted to deep fry their turkey. Thoughts started racing and next thing we knew, that was the plan for Thanksgiving. This was new to both of us so it would be interesting to see how it goes. Now Ross to me was like my mentor in the kitchen. A lot of what I learned was from him. Thanksgiving morning arrived and we did all the necessary steps on how to deep fry a turkey without it exploding like people have done. On this day, it was cold and windy, so we had to set up a barrier to cover the flames from the wind. Because he was there with me, the turkey turned out great. A beautiful golden brown, juicy and just ever so delicious. Mission accomplished!

Fast forward a year from that, I was on my own again. I loved how the turkey turned out from deep frying it, I wanted to do that again. This time I was at my brother’s place. He and his wife left to do a little shopping I think, leaving me alone to do my thing. I got everything set up, and the day was much nicer than the year before. What could go wrong…? Apparently a lot. I wanted to add something new to the mix, so I tried a recipe that called for brining. Keeps the turkey nice and moist and full of flavor. As I dropped the turkey in the pot, I was having issues with getting the temperature right. It was below where it needed to be, so I kept raising the temperature. But unfortunately when it got up to temp, it kept going up. By this time I had dropped the needle to bring the temp down but it’s hot oil, temperature takes a while to come back down. I was so confused. I felt like Joe Dirt at the oil rig job he did. Eventually the temp went to where I wanted it to but the damage was done. Did not think once to take the turkey out of the fryer to let the oil cool down before placing it back in. And yes, I did noticed the turkey getting much darker than normal but I thought to myself, “Maybe it’s just darker in the oil.”

After pulling the turkey out, it was burnt to a crisp. There was so much going through my mind… before I just decided to head to my mom’s. Boy was that a treat when I arrived with the turkey. Everyone had themselves a good laugh and continued poking fun at me. All I could do was just sit there and endure the fact it happened. There was a plus side to this though. With the brine, and through the dried extra crispy outside, the turkey was still very good.

Be Thankful

Despite undercooking or burning a turkey, the fact of the matter is that it’s Thanksgiving. To be around loved ones and also be thankful for a happy and healthy life. Just last year with Covid being a factor, we canceled our Thanksgiving because I had gotten Covid several weeks before. But we just had to be safe so that was the decision to make.

I feel like here I can be more myself. Letting out some of my inner thoughts and sharing what I’ve gone through and what I’m currently going through. But nonetheless, being able to express my feelings. As a kid growing up I’ve always had a difficult time expressing my emotions with anyone. So if you were to ask me what I’m thankful for, outside of family and friends, it would be this. To start my own blog and use it like I would my personal journal. I get to share my stories with the World!(Universe maybe) Not having to keep things bottled up. And they say writing is very therapeutic. Thanks for taking the time to read this. Have a safe and joyful Turkey Day!

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My Hopeless Romantic Story Part II: Missed Opportunities

It seems like there will always be those few people in our lives, that we are attracted to romantically or sexually, get away. Whether we poor our hearts out in telling them how we feel, or say nothing at all, we’re left with those thoughts of, “What could I have said differently to get her to feel the same way? Or said anything at all.” Either way, the moments passed and you’re left with yet the same outcome… another missed opportunity. I did not expect that there was going to be a second part to this story. But I felt that there were a few other situations and moments that were left out that I wanted to share. So, here’s the conclusion to My Hopeless Romantic Story leading up to now.

Spontaneous Action

Before I go any further, if you haven’t read the first part to this story, then some of this may not make sense to you(now is your chance to do so). With that said, let’s continue. Not long after moving out of Harvey’s place to live with some of my friends from grade school, I was currently working for him. He was some Quality Manager and I was one of his unofficial Team Leaders or whatever the case was. Not important to the story, anyway, he had a colleague in the same position as him and we went to his place for some drinking and bon fire one late summer night. When we arrived, we cracked open some beers and headed over to the fire. There was this girl there that I’ve seen before on several occasions. We just never been formally introduced until that night. Her names Danielle and she was tall, blond, and hot. And no I don’t mean from being around the fire. As the night went on, everyone else was doing their thing while it was just Danielle and I by the fire, talking, and getting to know each other. She then tells me how her back was tense and sore, so I offered to give her a back rub. I had very little experience giving back rubs but fortunately, I turned out to be really good. She told me herself. So yes, I’m pretty proud of that!

Fast forward a couple months to October, right around Halloween time. There was an event going on downtown with deals on drinks with almost all the bars. This was our plan for that weekend. I didn’t have anything to wear so instead I just dressed up nicely looking like a Professor at a University. I spray on my Davidoff Coolwater cologne, not just because of the name but it smells really good. Before we left to go out for the night, my roommates and I were pre-drinking at the house to save money on drinks. So, first place we get to I run into Danielle. She’s looking hot and sexy, dressed up as Pocahontas. We lock eyes and she was more tipsy than I was, and I was pretty tipsy. We hugged, she tells me I smell really good(thanks Coolwater!), then whispers softly into my ears, “I want to f**k you.” I’m standing there with one of those bitmoji faces where they look stunned to what they just heard or saw. And just like a deer in the headlights, I froze for a moment. It felt a lot longer to me than in reality of course. I tell her, “thanks.” Still uncertain of what actually happened, I’m positive that I blacked out for a moment, because before I knew it, I was standing around near my roommates and that was the end of it… shocking I know.

Booty Call

A little over a year later, I found myself officially hired in at a company and no longer working as a temp. I had this coworker that I did not think that I was going to fall for. Her name, is Brittany. Short, somewhat blond, not really sure what because she dyes her hair and cute. I always try to remember from movies, TV shows and those crappy orientation videos about sexual harassment and relationships within the work place not to get romantically involved. But we all have needs. As a man, it runs in our blood. And that blood rushes to our penises… I digress. So anyway, after working with her for a few months, we finally hangout outside of work. Sometimes to house parties or bars.

One late night later, around 1 in the morning, she calls me up and I’m just at home watching a movie or something, says she wants to drink with me. And I remember telling Vincent and Rothana this(my roommates at the time), and they told me themselves it was definitely a booty call. I’ve never been a part of that before so I had to make sure I went through all the proper procedures. Made sure I had a condom, my pubic region was neatly trimmed… and I think that was it. Not that those matter to some people but who knows! So I pick her up from her place and brought her back to mine. She was already drunk and I’m just trying to play catch-up so it doesn’t seem weird. But I barely was catching a buzz. As I leaned back on my bed, Brittany begins to sit closer to me. We talk a little bit then suddenly, as she leans towards me for the kiss, she gets the hiccups. Now, in my experience when you’re drinking and you get the hiccups, you’re about ready to puke. Probably due to lack of water. So then after she has her hiccup, I tell her, “don’t throw up on me” with this stupid smile on my face… she completely 180’d her entire mood. Started getting on the defensive and I’m sitting there with that same stunned bitmoji look on my face yet again! A few moments later, I drove her back home and we did not make sexy time.

Hot Girl(Like from The Office)

When it comes to the workplace, I’m sure most of us have those individuals we’re attracted to. However they appear in our lives and what we do about it is a mystery… until now. At least with me that is. This hot, gorgeous brunette that goes by the name of Hailey is my Amy Adams… sort of. She worked as our company’s vendor. Supply us with snacks, food and drinks to our supermarket for people that forget or are too lazy to bring in their own food. And I’ve been there myself many times.

This was much more recent, only last year about a couple months before Christmas when Hailey and I met. We went through several vendors for the past 6 months or so until Hailey showed up. The first day I saw her I already knew I wanted to talk to her and hoping it would lead somewhere. Love at first glance maybe? So of course, I needed to come up with a game plan. Find my in towards having a conversation with her and the rest is history. Yes, to some people it does come more natural just to strike up a conversation, but to others like myself, not so much. I always had difficulties breaking the ice but after that, I’m gold(or should I say doge… no that’s not that high right now… let’s say bitcoin!). After the ice breaker, I’m bitcoin!(but I don’t have any bitcoin… I do have dogecoin. You know what, this is besides the point! That’s why I’m leaving it in parenthesis)

Anyway, Hailey and I got to talking, she tells me she has a kid which I have no problem with. And one of the biggest turn-ons she mentioned to me was how she used to play hockey back in the day. I’m a big fan of The Mighty Ducks which was why I loved going ice skating but almost no one wanted to go with me when I would bring it up as something to do. So this would go on leading up towards Christmas where we would talk a couple times a week when we would see each other. The second to last time I would see Hailey was when she told me she would be gone for the last two weeks of the year for relocation. And on the last day that I saw her, she had changed her look. Letting her hair down, putting on some make-up and perfume. She sent me all the right signals to ask her out, even my thoughts was telling me to ask her out. When I talked to her in person for the last time, it never happened. I froze…

When I left work and got into my car, I kept telling myself that I should just go back in and do it. Man the f**k up… but I didn’t. Instead, I waited until the new year to finally have the nerves to ask Hailey out. Unfortunately she no longer was there at our location. So this gentlemen took her spot and after a month, I asked him to see if he knew her, which he did. I had this letter that I wrote for Hailey in case there was any chance at all that I would see her so she can understand what I was too afraid to tell her in person. I put a lot of effort into it and everything. Wrote in cursive, used one of my special ink pens and folded it up nicely. I gave it to the guy to give to her which he did, and I’m thankful for him in doing that. Hailey did reach out to me telling me how nice of a gesture it was and we texted back and forth for a little bit. But unfortunately I think she was just hoping I would already ask her out which I didn’t until later. And by that time she had already stopped replying to me, meaning I missed my window.

My Love Life In A Nutshell

Maybe the chase is all I enjoy doing. Building tension between me and the one I’m sexually or romantically attracted to. But to not have the courage to ask a beautiful woman out when she’s sending me all the signals I could ever ask for, is beyond me. I’m willing to admit that I’m messed up in the head with women. And it goes back to my past when I would get stood up, I just know it. But that’s the past. Yes, it left a scar, but I have to be able to move on and get over my fear of it and that’s the problem. I’m afraid to ask women out because I feel like it’ll happen again, but that’s negative thinking. Best case scenario they say yes and I do go out with them and have a great time! Maybe I’m afraid if by asking them out that I will succeed, and be in a happy and healthy relationship.

This was incredibly difficult for me to write knowing that I’m reliving those moments. But I’m glad I did because I do hope that for anyone reading this, it could help them out or they themselves were in a similar situation as me, knowing they aren’t alone.

My life really is like a movie, or even a television show. I guess it would depend on the plot at that moment. And if people from all over the Universe with highly advanced technologies is watching, they would be entertained to say the least. All I ask is when I’m in the bathroom or having private time, just leave me be for those moments. Unless there’s a Universal Pornhub website to watch me do the nasty… anyway! At this point in my life, I have faith that I’ll be a lot better if I ever find myself in these similar situations again. Life is one big lesson. The question is, “Are you willing to learn from it?”

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My Hopeless Romantic Story… so far

From girls to women and me becoming a man from a boy, my love life truly was, and still is a spectacle. From middle school throughout high school I’ve had girlfriends, crushes, and even gotten stood-up… on multiple occasions. One of my strangest moments was playing strip poker with a girl from high school whom I rarely talked to until only recently after we graduated. Not exactly sure how we got to that situation, but it was definitely interesting. I got to hold hands with my first crush roller skating to Aerosmith’s’ “I don’t want to miss a thing.” Only she was skating backwards, not messing with my masculinity whatsoever. With all of that being said, here’s a much longer story of how my love life has gone.

The Girls From School

Everyone seems to have those typical cliché high school romantic life. You’re either all alone, hooking up with multiple girls, or have that long lasting relationship with your sweetheart. So where am I in this category…? When I was in school, I was normally a very quiet person. Stuck to myself for the most part, and didn’t have many friends. I knew a lot of people, but that was mostly it. I did have a small circle of friends I’m proud to say that are close to me to this day. My grades could have been better, but I found it difficult to pay attention in class because I was distracted easily by the girls. They always thought I was cute, like Snoopy(sorry, had to use that Rush Hour reference).

My freshman year was quite a wild one. Never thought I would be brave enough to ask out as many girls as I did. I had the biggest crush on this girl that seemed really interested in my life, Erica. We never dated or anything, but would always write notes to each other in English class. She was the only girl I knew back then that was curious about me on a personal level. Not even my girlfriend at the time asked me personal questions or tried getting to know me in that way. We did however wrote letters to each other and talked on the phone. But when we were together at school, we barely had a conversation. Our relationship didn’t last that long.

Fresh off a relationship, I just started asking these girls out I thought were pretty and cute. They agreed to going out with me, but when it came time for us to meet up at said location, not a single one of them showed up. I was hurt, and sad. To be 14/15 and ecstatic to go out with someone only to get stood up emotionally is just devastating. My spirit was crushed because it happened to me more than once. And pretty much from there, I went on the rest of my high school days living in disappointment and lacking confidence. Afraid to ask anyone else out because I’ll always think to myself, “what if I get stood up again?”

A Terrible Wingman

Wasted half my life on a friendship that should have ended a long time ago. But if I knew what I know now, we would have never been friends from the start. All things considered, he made a great Antagonist in the story of my life. I won’t call him by his name on here due to the fact I want nothing to do with him. There were definitely some scars left on me(mentally) from the friendship and it was still pretty recent when I chose not to talk to him anymore. I guess for the sake of this story, we’ll call him… Harvey(yes, like Harvey Dent a.k.a. Two-Face because that’s exactly how he played out to be in my life).

I met Harvey through my brother when I was about 13 or 14. Since my brother and I were really close and I didn’t have a whole lot of friends, I got to meet some of his. So, later down the road I would end up hanging out with Harvey just us at times, and I did get to meet his cousin who, I had a crush on for years. But nothing happened between us, just a little bit of sexual tension… I think. Anyway, there were several girls in my past that I did have a thing for, and I always thought that Harvey was such a great person because he had a way with words, and I was hoping he could help build me up with these girls. I would have to find out the hard way many times that it was not the case at all. As far as I knew, he only talked to them for himself. To the point where this girl I liked, he legit stole her from me. We ran into her at a bar downtown and I offered to buy her and her friends a round of drinks but he put it on his tab and took credit for it… and this was on my birthday! It didn’t end there either, despite him having kids with her. I met this really nice woman from a bowling league we had and by this time, I had gotten a lot better talking to women. And again, he would butt in and keep the conversation between them pushing me out. This was getting real old and it was only about a year after that I knew this friendship had to end.

Some of my closest friends would tell me how unfaithful he was and how poorly he treated me. I guess because when I met him at such a young age, my underdeveloped mind was processing information differently. There were countless times I knew he would make me feel awful and resent him as a friend. But something always brought me back to him. Now, I could go on and on about him but I’d rather not. Maybe I’ll save it for my autobiography I’m thinking about writing in the near future. Life has to go on, no matter who’s in it or not. Should have listened to my friends a lot sooner. But better late than never. And since I dropped him, I know I’m better for it.

Public Places

Being a regular at restaurants and bars aren’t all bad, the servers will remember your drink orders. At least, that’s me of recent versus how I was, say, about 10 years ago. I was out with some old high school friends I hadn’t seen for a while and my goodness, my drink orders were the definition of a failed moment. It started off fine, just a water. Then I was craving something else, wanted to talk to our waitress more, so I ordered a lemonade. A little while after that and eating our food, I then decided to get a beer, just to make conversation. The routine I made of how I got to ordering these drinks was incredibly shocking… in a disastrous way. By this time, one of my buddies made fun of me for that, jokingly of course. It goes on my ‘epic fail’ moments. Let’s just call it a good lesson learned!

Not long after I turned 21 I went out with Harvey and some of his coworkers at the time to a restaurant to meet up with them. I was always really quiet, but who wouldn’t be? When you’re that young, and surrounded by people you don’t know, it’s difficult to make conversation especially when you’re an introvert. I have gotten much better at talking to people since though. So we’re out eating and having a few drinks, talking and laughing, then everyone wanted to change the mood a bit. Head to a bar with a dance floor. I met this sexy little minx named JC, as they called her. She was a friend of the coworkers. We locked eyes at one point on the floor and started dancing closer and closer together. This random guy saw us breaking it down and thought he should get in on the action(thinking there was going to be a dance-off). He goes a little over the top with his moves, leaving him to literally dance off of his shoe. Moments later, JC saw his shoe on the floor, grabbed it, and chucked it back at him, not realizing I was in the pathway between her and the guy. So this shoe hits me in the head and now I’m a little dazed and confused. JC immediately comes to me apologizing and then giving me a big hug that nearly sent us falling over. Unfortunately I would no longer see JC after that night. We never exchanged numbers or anything. But at least I was left with a good story and an interesting little moment.

A Friend’s Friend

I feel like we all have those friends that want to introduce you to one of their friends. In this situation, it’s always the friend’s girlfriend’s friend. Playing matchmaker. I can’t quite recall the occasion, but little did I know, I was going to meet my boo… Kait. Kait and I had one of those types of relationships; the sexual tension, an unspoken thing, and playing each other hot and cold. She was much better at the hot and cold thing than me. I was pretty bad at it. When we first met, she had this wild glowing look. Curly blond hair and red lipstick. She liked to stand out. But later would go to red hair, which to this day, I have no idea what her natural hair color is. We would watch basketball together rooting for the Bulls. This was during the time Derrick Rose was top dog. Back when the era of the NBA was, at least to me, at one of its’ highest peaks. Before all the big threes joined forces. Yeah, so we got together for that, out to the bars and even celebrated New Years. After waiting in line to get into the bar for a couple hours in the cold, we had just about 5 to 10 minutes before midnight. We were with one of my buddies I met from high school as well. Had a round of shots, the clock is ticking, and people are counting down from 10. And there we were. Eyes locked, almost midnight. Not certain if I should have gone in for the kiss when that hand hits 12…

Kait and I did quite a bit together. Watching sports, going out to the bars, clubs, to city events and watching a movie at my place in the dark with no one around. All of these and yet… I never made a move. Not even a single kiss despite many opportunities. I can’t really explain it, why we never happened. And now she’s married and has a child, which I’m very happy for her and her family. But after writing all of this about her, about us, I think I know what it was… that chase. I really do love it, and I’m not sure why or how I became that person. But eventually the chase has to end.

What Have We Learned

Whether I’m getting stood-up or dealing with issues at home, I know my friends always seemed to have my back. They were very supportive and lifted me up in a way I never thought. Even when I was at one of my lowest. Thank you all for being my friends. You guys know who you are. As far as hindsight goes, I seen it way too late that a girl from school had liked me while I’m busy telling her about another girl that I liked. So sorry Jaclyn. I saw the look in your eyes at prom and I thought the same thing. Maybe in an alternate Universe we could have been. Although I’m really slow in seeing these situations, I tend to learn many things the hard way. Like how some women give off very easy signs they like me and yet I still find myself unable to ask them out. It may have something to do with my past and being afraid to make that next move. Ladies, I’m definitely working on it! Just be patient with me a little while longer. With that, I do hope you enjoyed this read. It’s definitely one of my longer posts so far, but I am a better man for everything that has happened to me.

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My Job Experiences

I couldn’t tell you how many different jobs I’ve worked at. But if I had to guess, it’s somewhere around 25-30. If it sounds like a lot, that’s because it probably is. Most of my life I have found many passions and interests in things that took little effort to building a skill to a lot of it. When I would do something that I enjoy, it typically only lasts so long before I end up losing interest in it and wanting to find something new to try. Why that is, I don’t know. That’s just who I am. Same with me playing video games. Most games with a storyline that I would play, I’ll end up stopping midway through the story. The game itself is good. It’s almost as if I don’t want to see something good come to an end? Not sure if I can say the same with my 25+ jobs though.

Manufacturing

Since graduating high school, I left my part-time job to switch to a completely different field. Something that would change my life for over the next decade. I got myself into the world of being a blue-collar worker. Knowing what I know now, there’s a lot of physical stress that the body goes through. Like one of my last jobs I had, having to do the same things over and over repetitively caused soreness on my back and shoulder blade area. That’s mostly the whole concept of factory work. It’s very repetitive. So within this decade or so, I ended up jumping around one job after another with maybe one or two non-manufacturing jobs in between there, until I hit my mid 20s. At that point, when you realize you have more responsibilities, rent and bills to pay for, you start to change your mindset to settling down. Which now writing this down as I go, is so disappointing.

I Chose To Settle

With all these extra responsibilities, I knew I could no longer continue switching from job to job. Especially working a temp position making about only $9 an hour. I had to make a decision and of all the decisions I made, I chose one of the hottest environments to settle at. This company that I worked for that I spent 8 years at did not have any sort of air conditioning on the floor. Only in the offices. The department I worked at, the machineries temperature got upwards of 500 degrees Fahrenheit. So basically with that, my areas average temperature felt like 100-110 degrees with hardly any ventilation, and a couple small industrial fans blowing hot air on us. There were countless times I sprayed my face with the water bottles we used to clean the machines at the end of our shift.

It wasn’t all bad though, I got to work with a very good crew. My boss saw something great in me, so she pretty much let me lead my own team knowing she didn’t have to micro manage us or worry. We crushed it! Beating out the other 2 shifts easily. The morale within our team was high, everyone that I know of got along great and just about every Friday mornings after work we would head to the bowling alley for drinks and bowling. It was really something special… but that moment only lasted so long. Not long later, people started quitting or transferring to different departments and nothing was the same. Eventually I left also to try my hand on something new.

About 5 years into my job and trying something different, I was on the brink of quitting my job. The department I was in wasn’t so great and half the people I worked with were somewhat sleazy. Although, some of the women I worked with enjoyed my company. Always nice to leave them laughing and smiling by just being me. But I’m the type of person that does let the few negatives outweigh the many positives. People I tell ya. They suck sometimes. How difficult it is to be short and skinny like myself and get picked on in ways that most people wouldn’t see. The haters are so subtle about it… sorry, just needed to get that off my chest.

Electronics/Engineering

So I’m about to quit but there was a new position for a new department opening up. An electronics assembly line. Where we had to wear these ESD smocks and shoes or shoe covers so we don’t emit any electricity on any circuit boards we worked with or are near. Little did I know, this position that I got was going to be both great and terrible. Again, for the most part, the people were great, my boss was great. I got to work with the engineers and understand how circuit boards come together. During training, the soldering part was pretty wild. I enjoyed that part the most. I made some friends and actually started eating healthier too!

Once we got settled in after about a year, things got worst. We were scheduled to produce numbers that were unobtainable even running 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. We ended up working mandatory 7 days for the foreseeable future. Which ended up lasting about 2 years or so minus most holidays, call-ins and vacations. Vacations on the other hand were mostly stripped away from me. Considering I had the 2nd lowest seniority of the team I worked with, I had almost no time to use my vacation leaving me having to work almost every weekend. I was drained, exhausted and burnt out. At this point, I hardly saw any of my friends or family, leaving me with no energy to do anything once I did finished work. I was about done. And I did so much too from what my boss had asked from me. More than what my typical job duties were. Only time we had a break was when Covid hit. It was such a needed time off. 5 weeks to be exact.

To Sum It Up

I left my job about a year after the shutdown due to Covid. Between that time, I had learned so much about myself and my surroundings. From what I would say, I got to do a little soul searching. It led me to wanting to do something different, away from factory life. I know there’s so much more out there and that I never got to experience the possibility of what I could be great at. So now that’s where I am. Back to exploring life and other jobs because currently, there are job opportunities almost everywhere right now. Doesn’t seem like anyone wants to work or maybe they have found something themselves to live a much happier and healthier life. I do have faith that someday soon I will find what it is that I’m looking for. The question is… what is it?

From my many coworkers and bosses, they really did all range from bad to great. I got to experience from both a white collar and blue collar’s perspective of what a business is like. Definitely got to talk to and get close to the many managers of my most recent job. It’s made me think… maybe I start my own business?! Only time will tell. And if I have the will-power, of course!

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My Current Status

It has definitely been a while since I last posted and for that, to anyone, I’m sorry. In the past few months I’ve gone through quite a lot emotionally and mentally. From trying to cope with my family issues, to getting a second part-time job and going on my first date since the start of Covid(to name a few). I consider this one crazy roller coaster of a life just recently. This isn’t going to be anything like my other random posts. And for that, you have been informed.

Family

Look, don’t get me wrong, I love my family to death. Even if I don’t show it. But then again, my entire family doesn’t really show love either. At least not in a way most families do. Like what you see in the movies or TV shows. Maybe it’s just how we were raised, but the best way to put it like my Aunt’s boyfriend once said to us many years back, “I’ve never met a family so ununited.” He’s not wrong. We hardly speak to each other about our issues or how we are emotionally. Most of how I deal with life was through television, and how everyone in it got through their problems. Never worked out so well for me considering my situations were mostly different and I always felt like I had nobody to talk to. I know there’s plenty more I’d like to say on this subject but let’s just move on. So long story short, I’m on my own and hardly see my family anymore. Mostly only see them during the holidays. I show my love for them from a distance.

My New Job

So I started my second job just over a month now as a Host in the restaurant business. Something new I’m trying since I consider myself to be a “people person.” If I’m being honest, I thought at this point in my life I may have gotten a lot more blog posts up on the internet and would get noticed enough to not have to work any jobs and do what I enjoy doing. And one of those would include writing. Which brings me here, the work is easy and for the most part my coworkers are pretty cool. I have found a liking to a few of my coworkers which makes the work day, or night, much easier. Although, there is one individual I am not too fond of. After only working with him just a handful of times, I’m already picking up on his behavior towards me that gives off a negative vibe. I won’t go into details of what that is. Just needed to get that off my chest.

First Date Post-Covid

One of the good things about working at the restaurant was that get to meet people or guests as we call them. After just briefly noticing this individual, we went out on a date. And I have to admit that I was a little nervous, which I did tell her so she wouldn’t get any awkward vibes. It went really well. We went to a distillery because the original plan was this Fall Fest that was going on downtown was canceled due to the rain. I didn’t expect us to talk for as long as we did, so long in fact, that the distillery closed and we ended up continuing our conversation afterwards. But before that, something magical happened. As my date went to use the restroom, and there were only a handful of people left inside, Backstreet Boys’ “I Want It That Way” came on and I couldn’t help myself and started singing with it. A few other people sang with me and we all knew… this was going to be a moment. My date did catch the second half of my performance.

My Current Status

Family will be family and I’ll love them all unconditionally. No matter what happens. And as for my new job, people will be people. As in haters are going to hate and lovers… will love. That’s what makes us all unique as individuals. The people make the job experience. Whether you want to stay because of them or quit because of them. And for my first date in a long while, it went a lot better than I expected. Just some of the beauties of taking a chance on someone. So much so, your coworkers will ask about it!

As for me, life can be pretty difficult to deal with. Some things are hard not to think about, especially the negatives. But I’m very fortunate to have people that care about me and my well being so it does make it easier to talk about. The progress is slow but I am healing nonetheless. Until next time…

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First Plane Ride & Airbnb Experience

Introduction/Wedding

Planes, Airbnb and a wedding. None of this would have been possible if not for my friends Vincent and Eddie. If I went at this alone I’m certain I would have been lost at the airport and my flight would have left without me. With that, I would have missed out on a friend’s wedding and a hidden nightclub to say the least. So, to tell this story we’ll have to go back to 2015…

A friend of mine, Wae, recently moved to Texas and was soon to be married. Our history, he is the brother of my sister’s baby daddy. We knew each other already but when I got a temp job, not only did I work at the same location as him, but we ended up working in the same department. So that brought us closer together. Wae was a big influence during my early fitness days. He got me to workout with him at the gym he went to. And as we like to call it, we were getting “swole!”

So it was a traditional Lao wedding. An event that I believe goes on an entire week. But probably ended up being 2 days maybe. From preparations to having monks come and blessed those who are soon to be, and of course, the reception. Now, you know it’s an Asian wedding if there’s Remy Martin, Hennessey, Heineken and Corona involved. So, this wasn’t one of my most proudest moments, but when I was at the venue of the wedding sitting at a table, I noticed that the servers bringing out the food was wearing the exact same thing I was. A simple white button-down shirt with a black vest and tie. One of the guest at the wedding mistaken me for a server too. I’m sure they weren’t the only one. How embarrassing for me. Eventually, after a few drinks I was able to look past that and still managed to have a great time, even though I knew almost no one.

Posing before heading off to the wedding. (Photo by Eddie)
Sangria bar?
Art inside the Dallas museum
Candy shop with a bouncer?
Hidden nightclub. (All other photos complimentary by Vincent)

My Experience

Going back to the flight, I probably wouldn’t have even gone if I was by myself. Fortunately some of my friends wanted to tag along and experiencing the city of Dallas. The worst part about the flight for me was descending. Every time I flew my ears would pop, even when I would chew gum or tried plugging my ears. So the flight was taken care of for me as I set-up the Airbnb, which was a nice cozy apartment. Only like a 5 minute walk from downtown. Thank you Natalie for the listing! I would definitely stay there again if I find myself back in Dallas.

A lot of what we did was checking out dive bars, eating a really large pizza because, well, Texas. Found a nice Mexican restaurant with cheap margaritas, checked out the museum and a couple nightclubs. And I can’t say exactly how it happened but we somehow found ourselves inside a pretty cool nightclub, which was hidden behind or underneath a candy shop. Overall, it was a great experience for me with plenty more stories like this to come. Stay tuned!

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