You’re standing there. Eyes gazing into one another. There’s so much you want to say to her, especially how you feel about her as well… but you don’t. Instead, you play the role of the good guy who listens to what she is telling you so you could respond with an answer that isn’t anything but the point. Either way, that tension that you have with each other isn’t just coming from you. It goes both ways. At least that’s what you tell yourself. Because you have to believe that she feels the same way. The entire time you’ve known each other nothing ever happens. Only because you don’t want to ruin a good thing. And that’s the problem that us guys have telling the women we fancy how we feel. Expressing our feelings is one of the hardest tasks to do. No matter how many times you may play out the scenario in your head, or out loud to yourself in your one-bedroom apartment with no one around to hear you (except maybe your neighbors if you’re loud enough), when you’re put on the spot, it’s a much different story. So, what do you do? If the wrong move is made, you may have just destroyed everything you’ve built in that relationship. But at least you gave it a shot. In my opinion, the chase is something we all love to feel. Not knowing if the person you like, actually likes you back. Whether it’s love or not, how are you ever going to know if you don’t give it a chance? You’re just going to have to figure it out for yourself.
How I Manage My Time & Money
2 years ago (2020) the world experienced for the first time in this modern age, a pandemic. Right before everything pretty much shut down, I was working 7 days a week at a dead-end job that was burning me out. Sure, the money was good. But where’s my free time? When am I going to be able to spend this money? I couldn’t. For the longest, I was miserable because it was work, eat, & sleep, and not a whole lot else. My boss at the time jokingly said to me that I wasn’t getting any action. As in no sexy time. No making the bed rock. You get my point. I didn’t say it out loud, only thought about it to myself. I said to myself, “No sh*t. How am I going to meet women when I’m stuck working here every day?” Most of my energy was drained from the job. Yes, the job was easy. But when your boss asks you to do all these extra tasks and work, it’s difficult for me to say no. Not just that but the job can be stressful. Especially when things don’t go right (which was more than half the time). Machines would break down or not work properly, and half the time the lead engineers would not be around. That’s where I came in to start learning some of the stuff they did when they’re not around. My boss would rely on me quite a bit to do so much more than everyone else. He knows that I have the capabilities to do that because, and I say this lightly, I’m his best worker. No extra benefits. No incentives. No pay raise, nothing. Just a job well done (well, we did manage to get a dollar pay bump when I threatened to quit). I’m sure he didn’t do it on purpose, that is to take advantage of me. I was Dwight Schrute to his Michael Scott. Except he was no Michael Scott. The Assistant to the Manager. Overall, I will say he was a good boss though. Outside of the facts I mentioned. He lacked the charisma and hilariousness of what Michael Scott represented. Still a good boss, nonetheless.
Anyway, the lockdown happened, and I was off work for just over a month. I was collecting a nice treat from unemployment. To me, this was more money than I have ever made. From 7 days a week paycheck to the unemployment paychecks, I was transferring a good chunk of that to my savings account. With some proper budgeting, I know what was needed for my expenses and what could be used for leisure. I was still saving quite a bit. For the first time ever, my savings account was at its’ highest, and it continued to grow every week. So, what did I do with the free time that I had? I spent a good amount of it golfing with my nephews & their dad. We went out about once a week, and I forgot how good that felt. Forgetting how incredible of a golfer I was when I had time and practice to work on my golf game. Despite the terrible lasagna incident (loss of muscle mass and weight), I was still driving my tee shots pretty far. Money was definitely not an issue, and this was coming from someone who probably made about 50K a year. That’s it. That’s all it was, and need I remind you this was including overtime work, otherwise it would be much lower.
The point I’m making is with time and money, I could do so much greatness that will make an impact on not just my life, but those that are close to me. Not having the luxury of a wealthy life, I could only imagine what difference I could make with more time, more money. And without even realizing it, I’ve always been giving back to the community. The donations may be small, but it’s still something. Like rounding up my bill when I’m ordering food from a restaurant for a good cause or donating my clothes to Salvation Army and Goodwill instead of selling them. Growing up, I used to sleep on the floor. To make a living, my parents had to put in a lot of work to feed us kids. We didn’t have much, but we did make the most of what we had. So, if that tells you anything about my childhood, just know that I’m okay with the rough start to this incredible journey of my life. A journey with a story I hope to someday tell my future kids, and grandchildren. Something I never received myself considering I never met my grandparents. And being that I was transitioning from one language to another at a young age, I never got to hear the stories of my parents and what their life was like. How they met, the struggles in their everyday lives, coming to America and having me… the journey.
Outside from what this pandemic has brought us, it has gotten me to slow down my life a little bit to embrace it more. With a little soul searching, I am so grateful for this life I have and most of the people that are in it. Although, there are some things about me that is considered bad, I finally picked up on some of it and am working on bettering myself. Every day I try to be a better person. Every day I try to inspire hope for others. Helping others out towards their goals and dreams is a part of mine as well. I have a passion for life. All it took was a little perspective. Let’s change the world for the better!
My Story: Personality
“Who am I? You sure you want to know? The story of my life is not for the faint of heart…” (Tobey Macguire/Peter Parker) In this part of my life, we go into the development of my character, what it was like growing up, the movies and shows I would watch constantly, and how my personality came to be. In my family, there was no special treatment. Nobody got spoiled more than the other. I’m considered the baby of my family and oh boy, did I not get spoiled at all. At least from what I can remember. Besides that, I still had many memorable highlights of my childhood. The weekends almost always seemed to be quite unpredictable and pretty wild. Fridays we had TGIF on ABC with great lineups like Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Whose Line Is It Anyway? and others that I can’t quite remember at this time. A few other moments we had was watching old Thai Boxing (Muay Thai) videos my dad would rent from the Asian Market, and an old classic, The Gods Must Be Crazy. Who knew a simple glass Coca-Cola bottle could make such a big impact on an entire villages’ lives? I love how a movie with a simple premise could bring a family together for 90 minutes or so. That on top of other similar things was my childhood growing up. Like how we would host parties almost every other weekend. My parents were the best at it, at least in my eyes. They knew how to entertain our guests who were considered family-friends to us. Their kids were about my age and a little bit younger, and very fortunately, I had my older brothers and sisters with their creativity to keep the younger crowd entertained. From playing video games to using our imagination and constructing a maze in our basement was one of them. We crushed it! And for that, I’m very thankful for the inspiration my siblings and parents brought me.
The characters that we all play make us who we are as individuals. It’s not about our gender, or the color of our skin, but what we do that defines us (that last bit was a Batman Begins reference). Throughout my life I have built this personality from watching movies and TV shows that I loved. Most of them being in the genre of comedy. Great comedians like Robin Williams, Jim Carrey, and Adam Sandler were some of my inspirations. I wasn’t sure what it was for why I turned out the way I did, but something triggered within me to want to make people laugh and enjoy themselves when we’re together. With comedy aside, I also have a more… sensual side. Suave. Maybe it’s from watching movies that weren’t quite PG rated during my younger years. Like how I love the movie Titanic in hopes that someday I could draw someone like one of my French girls! Although, I’ll admit Dumb and Dumber had some references I did not understand when I was a kid. As I got older though, the so-called chick flicks were something I was into. I’m all about love and passion. Hitch, What Women Want, and all those Nicholas Sparks books turned movies. And then there’s Austin Powers, baby! Basically, it’s not just the people we hang out with that opens up our personality, but that we get it from the movies and television shows we watch too. They can be very inspiring and gives us the motivation we need to get out of bed in the morning and depending on who you are, hoping that today is finally the day you ask that girl or boy out from school, or a coworker that you see on a daily or weekly basis.
Nowadays we can get that from just about anywhere. Whether it’s from reading certain articles on the internet or stumbling upon random YouTube videos. The human brain is constantly learning and taking in new information. We just have to listen to it and decide for ourselves what’s right, wrong, and everything in-between. Don’t let your ego or stubbornness be the reason you won’t learn. There’s no harm in being a little open-minded. Allegedly, we only live one life. Why not make the most of it? Bring positivity to those around you, even if they don’t do the same. You never know if your actions could make an impact on someone else’s life. We are our best hope for a better world. So make it count! And with that, I’ve mentioned too many inspiring words. Peace, bitches!
P.S. I forgot to mention when I was with some of my family members hanging out at my nephews 21st birthday, we were just in the garage talking and drinking. This was close to a year ago, and I was saying something very inspiring and motivational, but I can’t remember what it was due to the fact… I was with my niece and her boyfriend in their car, and I took a hit from their bowl. Pretty much my mind was clouded a bit. Anyway, whatever I said had my brother-in-law telling me that I should be what was something like a pastor for the Buddhist temple. This struck a chord within me because I knew my father was something like that (I can’t remember the title of it). He spent a lot of his time at the temple talking to the monks and played a higher role in that community. I’d like to say most of the time where I get my words of wisdom from comes from my father. There was so much about him that I would have loved to know about his past but unfortunately, I’m not able to. However, I was able to find out more about him from my oldest sister. We were hanging out during fourth of July and I asked her about him. She told me the stories she would hear from them was how respected he was. This coming from army Generals, villagers, and plenty of other people too, I’m sure. Anyway, I just thought I would share that little extra bit about my father and the role he played that made my life what it is now. Thank you!