Tag: motivation

How Sleep Affects Your Happiness

As we evolve from being a young adult to adult, sleep starts to become less and less of a factor. And sometimes with that, lack of happiness. Not to say that you’re completely a sad old fart. You may tend to think about your past a bit more and remember some good times you had. But without a goal, constantly thinking of the past isn’t always a good thing. You forget to be present while being in the present. Just know that there are always going to be younger crowds than you and you may end up having to play the role model. Even if you didn’t choose to be, people could look up to you for inspiration.

I used to be that guy that always looked back at my past and wondered what went wrong with me, or why I’m not where I’d like to be in life. And also kept thinking about future plans for myself and think of steps to take to get to where it was, I want to be. But a good friend (and my hairstylist) once told me to live in the moment. And it hit me. There were so many times I was living in the moment and felt great about myself, but I quickly move on from it.

Now, just more recently, I’ve been trying to live my life in the moment and later on would recap my day. I would look back at the positives and if there were any negatives, I would quickly get through that and move on from it. Figure out what was not so great and try to learn from it to be better next time. And anything good, I like to soak that in just a bit longer because it felt great! It’s like I had my own highlight reel for myself like how you would see in pretty much every sport out there.

And to highlight this post, if you’re not feeling as great as you want to be, maybe you just need more sleep! At least we can start there.

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The Biggest Lesson I Learned from My First Job

Because I was only 16 when I first started working, mistakes were common but learning lessons was rare. Now, to be clear, I’m not just referring to my jobs. It’s my life altogether. As we stick to the working portion, one thing I know for sure when it comes to retail is you have to have good customer service skills. Other traits and your personality are more of a bonus to have when it comes to making conversation and having a connection.

Going back to my first job, McDonald’s. I’m not exactly sure how I was able to ace my interview but I did. My boss who interviewed me was amazed with my answers, but when it came to the job itself, there was so much to take in being in a fast-paced environment. For the most part, all I had to do was run the register, taking customer orders and greet them with a smile, which I did. However, there was a lack of motivation in my speech and how I was speaking to customers. How I know that: it was what my boss told me when she was letting me go. And unlike what we see in movies and television (at least from my experience), I was never told the words, “you’re fired.” It was almost always, “… we have to let you go” or “do better next time, stupid!” … okay, that last one was made up. But maybe a little transparency isn’t such a bad thing.

I personally prefer honesty, because that gives me insight on what I need to work on. Hence, the transparency. Having constructive criticism on our work is a good thing, but we cannot forget the how of it all. Like how to deliver the message to those so they can understand it and make the necessary adjustments needed to perform better at their jobs. Like I said before, it’s not just with our jobs, career, but with life.

Depending on your relationship and how you are with others, it’s easy to do or say something that could be taken out of context by someone else, just by saying the wrong thing… even if it’s not. That’s why I believe a huge part of conflict comes from misunderstandings. And how we react to it is mainly just our personality and lifestyle. These are the effects of life choices.

The choices we make determine how people perceive us, even if it’s one thing that doesn’t really define us. Unfortunately though, people are also quick to judge. But that’s also what makes us human. Whether it’s being bold in the moment or just trying something new, which I do quite often. And the end result: there are both rewards and consequences. For me, a good chunk of the reward is entertaining people like making them laugh. Then there’s the consequences…

As it may seem like I have this huge list of consequences, I’m pretty sure the positive outcome/rewards are about even, if not more. Like my constant battle with choosing to stay up late and almost every time waking up tired and unmotivated. Again, it’s all choice. The choice we make that has its’ consequences, has its’ rewards, all lead to the potential of having misunderstandings to conflict, and that gives us our personality.

My biggest takeaway from learning that I lacked motivation from my first job made me understood, knowing what I know now, who I was at that moment in my life. Quiet, in my shell and has yet to find my voice in the world. In public, I’m as shy as it gets, which makes it easier for people to take advantage of me, and have. Despite that, when I’m in my comfortable surrounding, I am quite expressive. Being around a smaller group of people or with one other person, I can just have a conversation with nothing held back. And that’s trust. Probably the reason why my inner circle was so small considering my life experiences. I put a lot of trust in people and there were times it backfired, but other times, it was incredibly rewarding.

So, no matter how long it takes you, if you haven’t already, take a moment to yourself to reflect on your life. Whether it hurt you or pleased you, just know, it’s a part of your life and your own. The outcome is what you make of it!

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Energy & Life

Life is beautiful. But life would not be what it is if we didn’t have the energy to be able to live it. Energy drives us. Energy makes us. It’s who we are and what we’ve become. Why is it that kids have so much energy compared to adults? In my not-so expert opinion, it’s because they take naps. They have a bunch of caffeine, like drinking a bunch of soda and eating candy. Something that keeps them going for only such a short period of time. Unlike when we’re adults where we do have our caffeine fix but then start to feel the crash in the early afternoon. Naps then ruin the rest of our day or help us push ourselves to work longer late into the night just to do it all over again the next day. But if we don’t take naps then we might just be getting by. Have just enough energy to get us to bedtime but wasting our day without being productive. Unless you live a happy enough life where that is perfectly fine with you. It’s only if you feel like you want more. Want to do more. Achieve more.

So, where does our energy come from? The answer to that is a bit more complicated than it seems. It’s possible that a good mattress will do the trick. Or having a clear mind will get you a good night’s sleep. What I’ve learned is that it very well could be a little bit of everything. Having a good mattress that suits you will most definitely help, and of course, clearing your mind of unwanted thoughts before bedtime. But in my experience, financial situations have made my life more difficult. It is possible that the thought of living paycheck to paycheck is keeping me from getting good sleep. All the more reason for why I have not posted in my blog for over 2 months. That’s just part of life as well. The fact that life can distract you from doing what you love. Draining away your energy without you realizing it. But don’t use it as an excuse. Just consider it an obstacle.

Never forget that life is a beautiful thing and that we are so grateful to have it. To be a part of it. Don’t turn into an adult and erase all the beauty in your imagination just because of your age. Be someone brilliant. You got this!

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Unspoken Words

As an entire civilization probably, we think about everything that goes on in our everyday lives. The problem though… is that we don’t express ourselves about what’s actually going on. If you’re confused, that’s okay. Because I am as well. John Mayer had this song, “say what you need to say“, and I could not agree more. How we feel and especially want to express ourselves, yet we keep it only to ourselves is, well, selfish. If anybody says anything that rubs you the wrong way, it makes sense to be straight with them right there on the spot. But life has a way of making us want to bottle these feelings. And why not?! This is what society has made of us. I could be wrong by saying this, but I really don’t care, and the thing is I feel we our all sensitive. The little things hit us right to the core, but by expressing it out loud would make people judge us, and lead to others talking about us behind our back. Not that we should even care about it. But maybe, just maybe, we do care. Of course, we want to make a good impression to everyone around us. And this is where I give so much credit to those that just don’t give a… poop.

Here’s another problem, though. To the people that don’t care, it affects those that do. The day-to-day stuff might just mean more to others, and we should all at least respect it. Stubborn is a word that I feel doesn’t get used enough. To me, it means that people aren’t open to new experiences. That’s why perspective is one of the most important things in life. You live most of your life knowing one thing, and that everything else is basically wrong.

It’s sad. Most people in this world feel like they have to hide behind this façade. And I don’t blame them. Life is difficult. One of the most difficult things is to be yourself. Who cares what you are. Be who you were meant to be. Because you were meant for greatness. You were meant to do things beyond imaginable. “Only you can prevent forest fires!” Sorry. I’m a comedian by nature, probably. But enough talk. Go out there and be the best version you were meant to be. As Joe Dirt once said, “Life’s a garden, dig it!”

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Writer’s Block

It’s happened before and more than likely will happen again. As writing can be very therapeutic for you, you just can’t help but have those days where nothing comes to you. Whether it’s an article, book, or anything else, the canvas is going to be blank. So, how can you change that? What’s causing you to have writer’s block?

In the last couple of months, writing for me has been incredibly difficult. Not just from lacking the creative mindset to put in the work, but with how I’m living my life as well. During this time, I’ve been completely unmotivated to work on any of the handful of projects I have going on. My free time consisted mostly of laying on the couch and watching TV or playing video games. Which I understand that the mind needs some time off from the real world. But where does it come from? Does it ever end? Or is it normal because life just is?

A short time ago I actually did something I only imagined doing but was not sure if I would need to. A went to seek help from a therapist. After my doctor’s visit, I was missing something in my life that kept me from being truly happy. That’s when he recommended I see a therapist. What came from this after just one session was that I felt like I might have been juggling one too many things that I wanted to do with my life almost all at once.

The other big thing I learned was not holding myself accountable. When it comes to some of my jobs, I’m great! I do the best of my abilities during my time at work. I show up when I have to, perform the task given to me and crush it. If only I could say the same to the many projects I’m currently or been working on for some time now. It’s the aspect of other people that I don’t want to let down. When it’s just me, I am responsible for myself. Am I just used to letting myself down knowing there’s no repercussions?

The seriousness of letting yourself down might be more punishing than what’s shown on the surface. Coming from someone who almost constantly looks ahead into the future. The days that turns into weeks and even months that goes by without accomplishing anything wears me down mentally. That disappointment of no real achievements and the constant let downs. It’s heartbreaking.

Anyway, by seeing a therapist, I want to better myself. I know something is off and know that change needs to happen. What it comes down to, at least for me, is that by having someone that I go to for help, I see them as a mentor. Someone I don’t want to let down. After just one session, I’m confident that every day will be better as long as I continue to work on myself.

So far, I’m already seeing progress. Up until this very post, I had been writing from home. Something I am implementing is changing location. It could be that the atmosphere or my surroundings was causing me my lack of motivation to write or work on anything I have going on. For anyone else out there that’s dealing with something similar, give it a shot. A change of scenery could do you wonders!

And if you’re like me, single yet ready to mingle, it could be a great way to meet people and potentially build a friendship, colleague, or even a mate… but only time will tell.

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The Time I Failed to Be a Good Samaritan

Not that long ago, in my neck of the woods, there was a snowstorm. Well, actually, more of an ice storm. It was freezing rain. While I was at work, it started accumulating only for a couple hours. Shortly after I would get off work, I headed home. As I came to a stop at a light, I noticed a couple vehicles stuck in the middle of the road. They were slipping on the road that had built up to be icy enough to make driving difficult.

For a moment, I hesitated. Not exactly sure what I should do. But after a brief moment, I took action. Pulled my e-brake and decided to at least try to help one car out. Unfortunately, I wasn’t wearing the best shoes, so I was constantly slipping on the icy road. Trying my best to help rock their car enough to get momentum to power through… yet nothing happened.

At this point, I was now holding up traffic, so I felt the need to get back to my car and apologizing to those that weren’t able to clear their car from that slippery slope. Not only did I not help, but I caused a bit of traffic. So, it was really a lose-lose situation. The only positive note was that I did not get stuck myself.

Moral of the story, when you try to be helpful to those in distress… it’s not as easy as everyone plays it out to be. Otherwise, it really is just me. Because here’s the thing: only a couple days afterwards, I was doordashing and was picking up an order at a restaurant. When I got inside, the assistant manager was on the phone trying to get a sheriff over for something that had happen not too long ago. This other gentleman that shortly arrived after I did heard that as well.

Then, not a minute later, this individual showed up causing a scene and the guy next to me just ended up leaving. The person that was making a scene started walking back into the ’employees only’ location of the restaurant and continued to get louder. It was at that moment I noticed an employee breathing heavily. At first, I wasn’t aware of what was going on with him. But shortly after, I just decided not to waste my time and ended up leaving myself.

After getting in my car and driving off, I started doing what I do best… using hindsight. The employee that was breathing heavily to me appeared to be having possibly a panic attack. All I could think of was what I could have done differently if I was back there. Which was trying to get his attention to me and to breathe slowly and take deep breaths. Motivate him and tell him he’s doing such a good job in calming down. To let him know that there is so much greatness out there in the world and not to focus on this one bad situation.

Sadly though… I did nothing… as normal. As much as I want to help people out, especially in situations like these… I crack under pressure. It may be one of my biggest weaknesses. I want to do better. I want to help those in need… maybe I’m just afraid. Or maybe I’m just too slow. My mind doesn’t always process things as fast as I would like. Some things, yes! But others, not so much.

Maybe that’s why I fail so much in life…

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What I’m Thankful For

It’s that time of year again. If you’re getting together with family, friends, or just anyone you care about. The holidays are there to bring us closer together. Although, it can be a stressful time of year (from what I heard on the radio), it’s also a wonderful time to be grateful. As we get older, we start to appreciate the little things more. The memories we made growing up and don’t receive as much of in our adulthood.

Life is a passion. Even if it may not go as well as you would like it to. But you can always change it. Change your mindset to something positive and you may just notice things will begin to look up for you. I have experienced lots of negative situations in my life and it also took over my mindset of negative thinking. So, from there that little snowball trickled into a raging snowman, then became an avalanche (wow, that was a terrible metaphor).

Over time that can weigh you down and mess with your mindset. But you can’t let that change who you really are. There’s a caring and loving person within all of us. No matter what your motivator is, whether it’s music, TV, someone you care about, etc. you are driven to always do better. Just gotta figure out what works for you.

Which is why I’m thankful for the world we live in and the life I have. There’s greatness from everywhere within our beautiful planet. The motivation we can receive from just about everything and everyone. Even though we’re not perfect and it may seem like we’re destroying this world, it only takes one of us to change that. Do your part to inspire others and help mother nature so she can take care of us.

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Why We’re All Sensitive People

It’s time to let your guard down a bit. Don’t always feel like you have to put on this tough person façade. Every now and then, let people in. I’m certain you’ll be a much better person for it. Otherwise, you’re just showing us the Ogre that’s within you. Sorry Shrek. Didn’t mean to call you out. But still! Even Shrek has feelings despite all the layers of onions he hides behind. You’ve seen the movie, I hope. If not, go watch it. Just remember that even though it’s just a movie, it doesn’t mean the point they’re trying to make isn’t true. And that just hits way too close to home with probably most of us.

On the inside we’re all sensitive (just like me), so embrace it. Share your feelings with the ones you trust the most. And to quote Shrek, “better out than in.” Although, he is referring to something else. But it’s the concept of your feelings we’re talking about. By expressing yourself out loud, you’re letting others in. Then, there comes a time in your life when your relationship with others may end. No matter who’s fault it may be, it just happens. You just don’t see eye to eye and have a falling out. And that can be a part of life. You learn and you grow from it. But you’ll be a better person in the end (at least I’d like to think so).

What every experience has taught me in life is that I take the time to learn from it. Good or bad, it becomes a memory that I can take with me and share it with others. If you embrace your feelings, who knows, maybe you’ll find yourself just a little bit happier. And that’s the right step towards a brighter future.

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Instagram Is Intimidating

This isn’t a bad thing, except for me. You’re shown an opportunity to see what the world is like. The scenery from what this great planet has to offer. Even from what the Space Jams Telescopes has shown us throughout part of our lifetime (of course I’m referring to the Hubble and JWST) … and then you have me. Or maybe people like me as well, for that matter. I’m more of an observer than someone who likes to post. Seeing people that I know and even random strangers all over the world with posts that can inspire, motivate, make laugh, to just about anything. I feel like my life isn’t entertaining enough for me to post consistently. Which is exactly why I just like to scroll through and see what the world is up to. And I believe that’s what intimidates someone like me. I do like Instagram and its’ concept, but the problem might be comparison. And that’s the wrong way to look at it. You should never compare your life to others especially with what is seen on every individual’s posts. Just be the best you, for you, and no one else. And that’s what I’d like to do myself. Inspire change. Because you never know who you may inspire with just one post.

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I Don’t Know How To Talk To Women

Before you start wondering, let me take you on a little journey from my past and put things into perspective. Growing up I wasn’t the greatest by any means when it comes to socializing with people in general. And when it comes to girls (especially if I had a crush on them), I would only know them through school, because they were my classmates. Then as I got older and started working, same thing, the women that were my coworkers I would be introduced by someone training me or if I had any questions. If you took those out of the equation, I would most likely get my confidence talking to them from an old friend, Mr. Liquid Courage himself, alcohol. Breaking the ice was, and still is, one of my biggest weaknesses. Whether I see a beautiful, cute, and/or sexy woman (or whatever adjective you want to use), it’s like I get stage freight. Especially if I want to talk to them. Because the truth is, I want to get to know them. Know their likes, dislikes, what they’re passionate about, have arguments over things that don’t matter. Even accidentally slip out a fart every now and then (let’s hope those aren’t on days I have a protein shake).

Anyway, you get the point I’m making. But what seems to be worse than these is what has happened to me lately. Although, I may only meet some women I find myself attracted to at work, it’s as if someone somewhere out there that I would consider to be of a higher power seems to take them away from me. On two occasions both women that I like ended up moving away. And not like down the street away, but to a completely different state. This not long after having a connection with them. But only for a moment I thought I might have been the reason why. The thing is I haven’t tried to make a move, do or say anything to make them feel awkward. They’re my coworker and that would change everything the next time I see them. Or what if it’s because I didn’t make a move? I’m sure that can’t be it. But I digress. Whatever the situation, I’m still alone which can be lonely sometimes. Not to say that I don’t like being by myself but there are times when I really would like to have the comfort of a woman with me. For all I know they could bring me one step closer to achieving my goals and dreams. The motivation that I hate to admit, lack more often than I would like. The drive that gets me out of bed every morning to take on the day with high hopes! But… it looks like I’ll have to do this on my own. I just have to be patient a little longer. I’m sure soon I will be able to find myself much closer to happiness.

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